365 pages

Part 5

12th September 2018

The night was weird. It started by me fighting with one person who I trusted more than myself. I can't help it, I'm sarcastic, but everytime you can't abuse the other person. It just hurts. I ended this shit, he was dead to me. I also texted another person who was the closest person to my heart, he turned out to be fake. Two people who I called family, were no longer alive for me. Overthinking at its finest. I thought my life was good, I was living in peace, but this night; I couldn't sleep all night due to some reason. Yeah, I lied. I never slept. I had a class at ten. It was six already. My mind was constantly thinking about things I never should have cared about. It fucked me. I was dead. I did not know what was going on. My heart was beating abnormally fast. Not that I had anxiety, but something worse. Not depression. I constantly changed positions, nothing made me sleep. I thought of taking pills but it was seven. So I decided to stay up till ten.

I went to college when I had my sociology class. As I entered the college, I thought of forgetting all that crap and start fresh. It wasn't that hard. I was blank by then, I completed my class. Couldn't concentrate properly, but it wasn't that bad. My next class was at three so I decided to go back. I went home and had breakfast. I WAS STARVING! I had a glass of milkshake and I started watching another film. Till the movie ended it was three so I left for college. College day was fine, I made a friend! It was fun. I came back around four and as usual, phone. I tried sleeping, but I could'nt I don't know why. It was starting to annoy me. The day passed as I watched movies and did nothing. At seven I decided to play Fortnite but after five unsuccessful games I realized I was a noob. NOOB. That did not work. Watched another film with dad and had dinner. Mom had made Biryani.

*Unpopular Opinion*

*According to me Biryani is overrated*

I then posted a picture on my instagram and watched my brother play ps4t all night long. I thought of watching another film as my class was at three in the noon. Now the thing that was annoying me that this thing (the fight) people had weird reactions like

"It's just a fight, you will be fine" Fights happen when you're just fooling around, I actually was hurt by those comments. Ok, you think I am wrong keep thinking. I DON'T GIVE A FUCK. Plus now If he is reading this... Mate, you're dead to me. And to everyone reading this, you don't like me? Fuck the crap, block me and move on. I don't want more toxicity in my damn life.

Plus, HOW DO I SLEEP?