Cold

Beth laid awake, watching her breath fog in the cold air of the room, huddling under her blanket in a useless effort to keep warm. The place they were currently in, gathering strength and resting was just an excuse of a safe place, letting in more of the frost and wind than a sieve let through water.

Walking through the forest, it had been Daryl – obviously – to have noticed a hunting blind propped up in a large tree, and had suggested them to take shelter inside it for the night. Despite her doubts, she had agreed to it, but now, that the temperature had dropped significantly, she wasn't so sure Daryl's idea of this place had been a good one.

Her lips, normally vibrant and pink, were now turning an awful shade of greyish blue, and she couldn't help but wish that they had a fireplace right now, or even a small fire, or even something to call four walls and a ceiling – anything – to keep her warm, and keep the chill away. Daryl had denied a fire immediately after the dark had settled over the hunting blind, adamant that it would either draw in more walkers or worse – the living. Of course, it would have been nigh impossible to get a fire going on the wooden platform, but there were few empty metal buckets they could have tried to contain the fire with. Yes, even Beth had to agree it was a stupid idea, but at that very moment in her life, she was more than ready to sell all of her worldly belongings, her mortal soul and Daryl's fucking crossbow to have some warmth in that despicable excuse of a hiding place.

A shiver wracked her spine despite all of her attempts to stay warm, and then settling into the limbs and muscles like a stubborn child, and making her movements sluggish, almost like slow motion. She yawned – even her jaw felt listless – and then shuddered again, looking at the small window, stretching her hand out toward it. Had the window been covered by a real glass it might have been warmer on the inside of the blind, but the hole on the wall was covered by some flimsy film of plastic, and she could feel it shift and give in when she touched it with her fingers. She wiped the frost slightly, peeking through the small, clear opening and saw nothing but darkness in the forest outside. Her hand rested against the window frame, and much to her surprise she found herself thinking how she couldn't feel the cold on her skin. She was most definitely certain they must have gone numb, despite the few blankets she had layered on her.

She shivered again, wrapping her arms around herself tighter, and shifted her gaze from the darkness of the woods to the small flat bed of the blind, where Daryl was now standing on guard in a revered silence. His breath evaporated as he stood there, his crossbow clutched in his hands, as he shifted from foot to foot, and then, leaned against the banister, surrounding the blind as he kept observing the ground beneath them.

The moment they had settled into the blind, he'd told her that he'd be heading out in order to find water, maybe some food too. He'd returned only a moment earlier, not saying a word, and scaring Beth as he climbed back onto the flat bed, and stayed outside. She knew he was cold, despite the multiple layers of shirts and leather vest and jacket, but was too stubborn to even admit it.

The cold seemed to have settled inside of her now, and she wondered if she'd ever get warm again. For a week or two now, they had woken up to find frost on the ground, leaves falling and changing color, and animals scurrying on in their business to fill their nests and storages for the winter. The change in the scenery and the seasons made Beth sad and anxious in a way she hadn't ever felt like before.

Before.

Before all this, before the Turn, she had actually enjoyed the fall, and the change of seasons, the cool, crisp air of autumn and the opportunity to wear comfy and warm sweaters and large scarves. She had enjoyed the beginning of school; she had enjoyed the steaming to-go cups of coffee or hot chocolate and sitting outside on the porch of their house at night with Maggie, and giggle about girly stuff. She swallowed hard at the thought of Maggie. She had to be alive, she just had to. Maggie was all that was left of her family.