Miranda The past Psycho teenager

The life that changed drastically

Hello it's me Miranda the Psycho teenager today is May 3, 2010 the day I started to slowly fall apart, and I know that this story at first you might think is boring or that your thinking how could a person write a story about their life and how they were psychotic at one point in their life well I thought about it to and here's what the answer I came up with is I know that I have had a bad past and that I used to have really bad issues but you know as I'm writing this I might actually have a chance to save someone's life or at least get them thinking about would you like to be known as the psychotic teenager or adult that could not get their shit together long enough to make a valuable change in there life. Ok enough about that lets move on to the story on this day or at least I think it was this day my father Kevin Douglas Croft got out of jail in which he had been in jail for five years for drinking and driving with my papaw and his girlfriend Donna also not wearing a seat belt and they got in a truck wreck and my papaw died and so my dad went to jail by the way this happened when I was five years old and may 3, 2013 when he got out of jail I was 10 years old so anyway while he was in prison he always made promise such as he was gonna change, stop doing drugs he was gonna spend time with me and be good and when he got out he didn't keep any of those promises he surprised me that day he got out of jail I was at school and when I came home there he was and he saw me for like An hour then left to go see old negative friends in which he started doing drugs again and after a while he was addicted again. Also I had a lot of other stuff going on such as when I was eight till like age 13 my brother was melesting me which eventually turned into rape and I was severely traumatized also my mom had abandoned me when I was 2 weeks old still a baby she broke my arm social services got involved and I was put in a foster home then when I was six months old my aunt sherry which I now call my mom and her husband my uncle Thomas my biological dads brother took me in an gained full sole permanent custody of me which was great because they treated me so well and I can tell you I was so spoiled at that time my brother was 3 and she also took him in he had a rough childhood to just like me my bio mom choked him and hurt him too so I guess he was traumatized to but that wasn't a reason to grow up and malest and rape your sister. I told people then I told the officers it didn't afterwards because I felt like everybody hated me because I told what he had done to me and he did do it but I was stubborn and I don't like people being mad At me so i said it didn't happen which is stupid because it could happen to any body else and I don't want that at all as you can tell a lot of trauma has happened in my life. I coped by cutting my self with razor blades my wrists my legs every where I was so ready to die I also tried other methods such as overdose of pain medications which were my mom/aunts because she has a lot of pain I've also tried to hang my self i got sent my first mental facility which is called Cumberland hall hospital I acted all fine for a week they sent me home I started doing the same things over and over again they just kept sending me back and when Cumberland hall wouldn't take me I went to Rivendell in bowling green then from there to river valley in Owensboro an they didn't help I just kept getting worse and more out of control I got into fights and a whole lot of trouble from then I was sent home then I started to get into fight a with my mom dad and sister physical I would hit them scratch them be very aggressive to them at one point I threatened to kill them in there sleep they took me to the police department and made me talk to a Court designated worker and they sent me to MCcracken County juvenile Detention center in Paducah I was an inmate there for 2 or 3 months it was horrible kids never go to juvie after then I was sent me to this long term place called Lincoln trails I was there for four months and it was horrible I was horrible fights every day restraints shots in your ass techs spit in your face I got through that went home 1 month later I was acting up again and got put in a whole other bunch of places until finally I got put into home of the innocents and it was great almost the best thing that ever happened to me I got to go out side had great therapist named Ms Amy and I got to go out to food places events every week because I was good I learned a lot I was on the unit gheens for teenagers who fight a lot I was diagnosed with bipolar depression I got put on mess that help and I wasn't sad no more I was there for 7 months and it helped a lot I got sent home and been home with no problems every since accept an attitude every now and then but what teenager doesn't have an attitude I've been home almost a year on October 27 I'll be home a year I'm writing this on October 4th this story is meant to be a life changer I hope you read the whole thing because I learned to value life and everything in it now I'm happy.