A Notch in Her Heart (A Pierce the Veil Fanfiction)

IX

Jaime's POV

Waking up in the middle of the night for no reason sucks. So waking up in the middle of the night for a reason sucks even more.

"Jaime, get up. Go talk to Belle, she's in the back lounge, crying." A whisper and a hard shake woke me up. I looked over and saw two green and worried eyes. I sat up in my bunk, a little disoriented, and shuffled on over to the lounge. Upon opening the door, sure eenough, there was my girlfriend, bundled in a blanket and crying in the corner of the couch.

"Belle?" I let out a yawn and she looked up. I had frightened her with my sudden presence and I rubbed some of the sleep out of my eyes as I took a seat next to her. She was shy and reclusive, the way she always was when she was crying, so when I opened my arms for her to give me a hug, I didn't get one. Instead I had to unwind her arms from around her knees and pull her away from her corner. I laid back on the couch with her on top of me, head on chest. I let her cry for a little and when the sobs slowed down, I tried again.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?" The large wet spot on my shirt told me that she had been crying pretty hard but she remained silent. I rubbed her back.

"Please? Emotions are like the air in a room. You can't air them out unless you open a door or something, and sometimes, that lets people in. She sighed and shook her head.

"Jaime, I don't want to talk about it."

"Please? Open the door, it's just me." I looked down at her and her eyes looked so uncertain. She sighed and looked away and I knew I had won.

"My dad. For three weeks, I've been crying over my dad with my mom. It's pitiful, I know, but... I can't bring myself to get over it. I used to love him."

"If you don't anymore then why are you crying?" She was silent for a while but I knew it was only because she had a lot on her mind. "You can't force yourself to stop crying and you can't force yourself to change how you feel. But you can force yourself to admit it."

"You're right. I miss him. I want to hate him but I can't. Why is this happening!? This isn't fair!"

"Love isn't fair... Do you want to hear a story?" I felt her nod against my chest like she might as well listen to a story. So I began.

"All my life, I never understood why no matter how many close friends you had, you sometimes needed that one special someone to be there for you over anyone else. It's unfair because we call it love but that person we're in love with has the power to ruin your life and that just isn't right. But you can't do anything about it because you love them in a way you don't love anyone else. Think about it, who the hell are you to walk into somebody's life and just control it like that? You must be pretty damn important to them..." She looked up at me like she expected me to keep going, so I did.

"So one day, my friend Jack called me over the phone. Poor guy was so beaten up inside. He was crying, and shouting, and breaking stuff in his room, so when I asked him what happened, you know what he told me?"

"What?"

"He told me that he and his girlfriend, Beatrice, got in a really bad fight. Beatrice was set on self destruct. She had problems she couldn't deal with by herself and all Jack wanted to do was help her. But you wanna know what she said?"

"What'd she say?"

"'Well don't.' She said those exact words to him and it tore him apart. They're fine now, and that's exactly my point. You can't control pain, Belle. But at the same time, you can't let pain control you. You have to accept it, its like a cold. Let it work its course, you know?" Her body had stopped shaking and I knew that meant she had stopped crying.

"You're right. Thanks. You guys have a show tomorrow, so go to bed." I was happy to be going to bed so I got up and began leaving, the way she told me to.

"Jaime, wait." Delaying my sleep plans, I turned around and walked back over to her spot on the couch. She was sitting up, and wouldn't look me in the eyes. I crouched down in front of her, using her knees for balance.

"Yes, Belle?"

"I'm sorry." I crinkled my nose at her.

"For what?"

"I'm just realizing it. You're Jack and I'm Beatrice and I'm sorry." I raised my eyebrows. She was right, that story was about us. The time she told me not to care about her and we all ended up in a great mess in a hospital.

"Oh. It's okay."

"No, it's not. That day in the hospital room... we agreed to just forget it happened but that's not right. That's not fair to you because you didn't get the apology you deserve and you didn't get the closure you probably need." I stood up. It was true but her grey orbs were staring into my brown ones so hard that I couldn't even take the truth. I wanted to forget but she wanted me to get what I deserved. I didn't want it anymore, though.

"Please, drop it." My voice was barely above a whisper. She stood up after me and disregarded my wishes.

"But Jaime, it's not-"

"Fair? Well I don't care. Please drop it because a lot of things aren't fair, okay!?" Her bottom lip trembled a little but she nodded and didn't shed another tear, or speak another word. She walked over to me and wrapped her arms around my back while I did the same. I kissed her forehead before burying my face in her hair.

"Love isn't fair."

Valerie's POV

Ashlynne put Jayne and I in charge of getting everyone up and moving at a specific time. Jayne and I both had the ability to wake up early and deal with it. Well, I dealt with it, but Jayne actually enjoyed being up at the ass crack of dawn. So I would be more harsh while she was more mellow. We balanced.

Waking them up was a hassle. We tried just calling them all at once but that didn't work. So we actually had to get them up individually. I opened the curtain to Tony's bunk.

"Tony! Wake up!" When he turned around, I jerked him by the shoulder. "Come on, fucker! Wake up!"

"Okay!" He sat up, jumped down from his bunk and walked past me. Beside me, Jayne was staring at me with a smug look on her face.

"What?" She laughed at me.

"You're too cranky! That doesn't make anyone want to get up." She was right. I looked in Jaime's bunk and she was already up and moving. I moved on to waking up Vic.

"Vic? Come on Vic, wake up please." I heard Mike walk behind me and I lightly poked Vic in his side. He shifted and blinked his eyes open.

"Hey." His morning voice was raspy and I took a mental note to have really great morning sex with him.

"Hey, time to get up." I pulled at his hands so he would get the point and he got out his bunk so I gave him a hug and a light peck on the lips. Tony walked by muttering something along the lines of 'evil morning bitch,' and I laughed.

"What happened to Tony?" Vic looked at me suspiciously and I led him into the kitchen.

"I woke him up like an asshole. He'll be okay after his shower." I waved off his curiosity and we sat around with Mike and Jaime, eating cereal in the kitchen. Jayne came in followed by a curly-haired Anne and a bloodshot-eyed Belle. There was an exchange of good mornings and they sat down with us.

I'm not sure what it was, but something was wrong between Jaime and Belle. They always ate side by side and would do those dumb puzzles on the back of cereal boxes together. But it wasn't just that.

Belle was barely touching her cereal. She was taking slow, little bites and her hand was shaking. She ate the full bowl, but everyone else was already done with two (We didn't have dinner) before she was even through one. No one seemed to notice.

When I looked over at Jaime, he was quiet and still. Jaime has too much energy to he quiet or still, let alone both. But again, no one noticed. I just kept it all quiet, but my eyes were on them.

Let's just see how this plays out.