Human || Lams (Completed)

So Tell Me You Can't Bear a Room That I'm Not In

Alex really saw George as a father figure, but he would never tell him that for the same reason he didn't call him "dad" or "father": He'd called his biological father that. His father was cold and terrible and abandoned his family. George wasn't his father.

When he fell asleep that night, for the first time in months, he had a nightmare about his father. He woke up in a cold sweat, the blankets by the edge of the bed. His cheeks felt wet.

He had to get out of there.

Not thinking, he got dressed, grabbed his phone and violin case like he would when he was going to school, and then walked out of the door. He walked to the small neighborhood park, sitting on one of the benches. It was cold, and in the pocket of his sweat jacket, he could feel a piece of paper. An old poem.

Reading the poem made him want to see John more than ever. It was late, way too late to be outside, but the ever-growing need to see him fueled him on and had him pressing call.

------

It was 2 am when John was woken up by his ringing phone. He groaned and rolled over to read who was calling with bleary eyes. Alex.

He clicked the "Accept" button. "Hello?"

"Hey John, I know it's really late and all, but can you come to the park by my house?" Alexander asked before quickly adding, "You don't have to."

That's how John ended up taking Henry Jr.'s car keys and driving to Alex. He was still in his pajamas, not even making the effort to grab a jacket. When he saw Alex in the headlights, he pulled up to the curb and opened the door.

"You coming?" He asked the boy.

Alex looked at him up and down, stopping at his pajama pants. He snorted, "Bears? Cute."

John blushed. "I got them for Christmas," he sputtered out.

"Yeah, yeah," Alex said. He stood up, violin case and all. "Where are we going?"

John just shrugged, getting inside the car and starting it when he heard the passenger side door close. Alex shoved his violin in the back seat.

They drove in comfortable silence, the radio softly playing. Neither knew where they were going, but it was okay.

They drove for at least 40 minutes when John suddenly found a vacant lot and parked in it. Alex looked at him expectantly, and John just pointed to the back seats.

He folded down the seats to make enough room for them to sit comfortably, making sure to be careful as it was technically his brother's. Even though the car was actually John's, the second Henry Jr. got his license, his father snatched the keys from John's hands and gave them to him. He frowned at the memory.

Alex picked up his violin case and sat adjacent to him.

"Why'd you even bring that?" John asked. The only lights he could see by were the small, clickable lights on the roof of the car. Right then, it felt like he could never live without Alex. Even the thought of being in a room without him seemed repulsive.

"Wasn't thinking," Alex replied. "You cold?" He questioned, seeing the way John was shivering in his t-shirt. When he nodded, Alex pulled off his sweat jacket and handed it to him.

John put it on, accepting anything being thrown his way at that second. Alex looked at him for a long while, and he suddenly felt self-conscious under his stare.

Realizing that John caught him looking, Alex whipped his head to the side and asked something John found strange. "You wanna try playing the violin? There's really nothing else to do."

Alex never trusted anyone with his violin. So why was he allowing John to play it now?

"Why not?" John watched as Alex opened the case, tuned the violin and put on the shoulder rest. He handed them to him.

"Let's just pizzicato for now."

He told him what each string was, how to tell what note something was by the fingerings, and where to put his fingers. He taught him the notes to "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star" first, only focusing on the D and A strings. When John messed up, Alex would move his hands to the correct place with a gentle touch that had John messing up even more.

The lights of the car eventually turned off but they didn't notice, because it wasn't important, not when they were shielded from the rest of the world together in a somewhat expensive, beat-up car. It was only when John got a notification from a game on his phone that they finally snapped out of the feeling of content, and the pair realized that it was already 4 am.

Alex pulled the violin out of John's grasp, his hands lingering for a touch too long. They both silently got back into the front seats and managed to find their way back to Alex's house.

Alexander grabbed his violin and looked at John, inching a little closer with each second that passed. He stopped himself though, leaning on the console with his face heating up as he quickly got out. He waved goodbye and almost ran up to his door, opening it with a key.

He was already inside when John realized that he was still wearing his jacket. He sighed and leaned to the side to grab his phone out of his back pocket, but stopped when he heard the crinkling of paper in the pocket.

He grabbed it uncertainly, reading the first line in blue ink.

Outpour
By Alexander Hamilton

He shoved it back in the pocket, feeling wrong for reading even that much. He put his keys in the ignition and drove off.