Shine

My name is Star and I am 15. I have blonde hair and blue eyes. I'm 5'6" and weigh 140 lbs. I live in Chesire, England and I have a pretty screwed up life. I am an only child and I live with my mom who is always out getting drunk and having sex with random guys. My only friend is my next door neighbor, Harry Styles. I met him when I first moved here at the age of 5. He was 6, 16 now. We didn't become friends right away because I couldn't always come out but we became good friends in the fifth grade, when I started to rebel against my mother.

I'm kinda lucky in a way. That I don't have all these birth deffects. My mom didn't really care that she was pregnant. Well at first she didn't even know but once she found out it was too late to abort me. Then she went and gave me the name Star... Yay..

That just adds to my problems... I'm bullied at school. I always have been.

It started in the first grade. I wasn't the best dressed kid because well my mom didn't care she just gave me whatever and called it good. People would whisper under their breath ugly, stupid, trash and other things. It never really got much worse then that but I was 8.. They hurt me. It was like that all year. 

In the third grade I had told a girl who I thought was my friend that I liked this guy. What she did was she went behind my back and told him and he said, "ew I would never like her, she's ugly." She came back and told me and laughed at me. She also told me that no one would like me because I'm ugly and had a stupid name.

When Harry came into my life he hung out with me all the time. Sometimes even ditched his friends to hang out with me because I had no friends. He was my best and only friend. It stayed that way through middle school.

But middle school.. The begining of seventh grade, I started cutting. I took a pencil sharpener from my school supplies and took the screw out. I went in my room and locked my door and cut my arm.. blood was everwhere. I cleaned it up after I had cut up my arm. I put a bandage on it and wore a bunch of long sleeved clothing.

After a year of doing it Harry found out. That was the first time I saw him cry...

One cut.. two cuts.. five cuts.. they kept adding up.

'Stupid bitch. What kind of a name is star? Are you a stripper? I bet you are.. fucking slut!'

All those mean names... I kept cutting and cutting.. There was so much blood and I was crying really hard.

"Star? You're front door was unlocked so I figured I would come in-" Harry walked into my bedroom. I hadn't thought to lock my door because my mom wasn't home but she wouldn't care anyways.

"Star! What are you doing!!" He ran and got a towel and held it to my arm to stop the bleeding.

"They're so mean to me Harry.. what did I ever do to them?" I cried. He looked up at my with tears in his eyes.

"Why would you do this..." A tear fell down his cheek. I didn't want him to cry..

"I'm sorry Haz.." I looked down. He got some bandages and wrapped my arm up then picked me up and held me against his chest while we both cried.

"Please don't do this again.." He was rocking me back and forth like a child. "Promise me." 

I looked up at him, "I promise."

I never did keep that promise.. He checked on my arms a lot so I started doing it elsewhere. My thighs, my hips. Anywhere he wouldn't see.

I'm a sophmore now. I have a couple friends. Megan, Crystal, and Rose. Then I have Harry. The boy I met 11 years ago, my best friend.

No one knows about me like Harry does. And no one ever will...

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HI...

I hope this isn't too depressing or triggering. I was feeling weird so this happened. I will post another chapter soon. I'm sorry this is short but it's just an opening :)

If anyone wants to make a cover for this story that would be amazing and I will give you full credit and a dedication along with a place in this story :) thanks

-Megan <3