Fml

I looked in the mirror, staring at something deeper then myself.I hear the ambulance rush past my house. That loud peircing  sound is so normal where I live as if its a daily thing. I didnt really care I was just asuming it was another homicide. I roughly apply red lipstick on my lips, using as much as I could so it wont go to complete waste. I take my long black hair out of the bun and let it fall down my back. I brush it to make sure every strand is straight. I reach in the cabinet to reach for my eye lashes. I take an extra $100 out of my pocket to wipe the extra glue off the bottle and begin to apply the lashes. I walk out of the bathroom in my dark house to find my bedroom. I take my long black dress and my red heels and put them on. I reach under the bed and grab my silver breifcase. As im finding my way outside the front on the house I hear my phone vibrate. I stare over at my phone lying on couch, and continue to make my way out the door. Opening the case it reveals thousands of dollars. Hysterically laughing I lit the money on fire. Making my way back into the house I make sure to throw some of the heated bills in the bush hoping the rest of the house would catch on fire. In the middle of the living room there's a chair. I make my way there and sit down. On my right there's a gun, on my left there's a rope. Before I choose I grab a pen and a napkin, I begin to write. " Let me tell you about myself, Im not scared to die. Been through so much, sometimes i wanna be in the sky. Wanna know how it feels to fly, Scared of hello, i ain't  scared of goodbye" I sign the note with my enitals so they know its real. I look Back up at my options. I decide to go with the rope because it would leave less of a mess then the gun would. Of course thats what got me in the situation in the first place. I care too much about others than I do myself. Dragging the chair over to the position under the hook on the ceiling and positon the rope. I began to put my head through. Before I kick the chair underneath me I think to myself  " Even when im up im feeling down"  I start laughing until  interupted by my mother running in the room. Suprised that she made it past the fire she looks up at me and yells "Whats going on ?! What are you doing ?!?" I Look down at her dumb founded look and say, "If they say life is like a beach chair, then why am I sitting in the dark ?" "What the hell are talking about ??"she barks back. "...Sometimes i just feel like..fml" I revealed as I kick the chair under me. Don't make my mistake.

Inspired by August Alsina's "Fml'

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline; (1-800-273-8255)