A series of bad decisions

A series if bad decisions

A series of bad decisions

Chapter 1

The day I die I will be free, no one understands what I mean when I say that but really I'm just saying I want to die.
Oh Sorry guys I kinda just went full in so I have to do some explaining so when I was 6 or 7 I got really mad and smashed a mirror, that's when we knew I had anger issues. It got worse when I was mad I would scratch my face till I bled a lot, it really sucked because I couldn't help it. Then came the depression and suicidal thoughts, drawings, actions and attitude and parents thought I was being over dramatic but I wasn't, I'm not then came my early teenage years and this is what my story is about bye my name is Addison.

As I wake up I yawn stand up and walk down the hallway to see my two sisters, mum dad and occasionally the two dogs but not today everyone was eating breakfast and talking, Jessie talking about band practice and drama club, Darcey talking about her stuffed animals and lps games while Mum and dad pretend to listen.When I walk in they all stop say "hi" then continue on with there perfect lives. As I sit down I make myself one bowl of Weetbix then Mum tells me "it's not enough food and maybe the reason I was always grumpy was because I didn't eat enough." Dads on his phone again doing god knows what and mum trying to look over his shoulder.
When I was done I put my bowl In the sink and walked down the hallway to my room. I get my school clothes and put on Spotify songs, but sadly all I can hear  is Jessie singing to the songs I'm listening to and try not to explode plus Darcy talking to herself about some shit no one understands besides her friends. Then I look on the mirror and die inside a little more. All I can think is "God why am I so ugly, why can't I be skinner prettier smarter and less sad?why can't I feel happy?" I try so hard but I can't. My mum always just says I'm being over dramatic and I'm fine or that I'm trying to be miserable and that it's making her miserable and dad says yes your mother is right and I'll say something under my breath then dad will say not to be so rude and I will have to apologise then I will walk out and start to tear up and then Jessie or Darcy will come out of there room and say why r u crying really loud so then Mum will say ugh don't cry Jesus so that's all fun and now I have to go fucking school. I would rather die then go there actually I would rather die anyway. On Tuesday I have a basketball game I can't even be stuffed to do things I used to be so excited to do and now I can't even find the energy to do it anymore it's actually really sad I wish I could have fun doing those things great Mum just yelled come on get in the car Addison get ur shit together and get in the car we're all waiting and then I got in the car and wait like 15 minuets for Mum to get in the car even tho she said she was waiting for me now we're driving there at least I won't have to deal with most of my family at school.
As I get out of the car and walk up the stairs to get into the year 11 area to walk to my class I feel a massive pain in my head and I feel like I'm gonna pass out and I immediately rush to my friend Lila's locker then to remember that during the two week school holiday i asked why she hadn't talked to me and was ignoring me and she said and I quote I'm just sick of all ur stupid drama Addison and I deleted her contact then I turned around to realise my actual friends Mimi jade cara stand behind me and hug me tight and say I'm so sorry but honestly if they really knew what made me stay home all of the two weeks off school holidays was because I was so depressed I couldn't get out of bed and then my parents made me then took my phone iPad and computer and the bell rang and I now have English great I have to present my speech to my class and as I walk to hometown to sit and listen to an asshole speak about the daily messages for 15 mins I see all the popular girls stare at me I just flip them of mouth fuck you and get to my seat and put headphones in then the bell rang again great I have English then my English teacher walks in and greets us and immediately writes down the  list in order of who's presenting shit I  think I'm 8th and I didn't do it suddenly the  first person stands up and presents then the second then the third fuck I need to do something and I put my hand up and ask to use the toilet and my teacher says make it quick so I stand up and rush to the furthest toilets from my class which happen to be the disabled bathroom near the year 9 area and the bathroom had two stalls and a door that locks so I run in and lock the door so no one can get in and I hear hey what r u doing I look up to see a blonde haired guy with eyes as blue as the ocean
"Sorry I'm just"
he cuts me off
"Ur skipping" he says
"Well technically yes" I say back
"I'm Matthew" he says as his eyes meet mine.
MATTHEWS BRAIN
I see a beautiful blonde haired  girl with eyes brown like chocolate but they have red and gold rings around them and her Rosie red cheeks turn fire red as she speaks she has anger inside her but also has a soft spot and she has many secrets.
"Why r u skipping" I say to her
"Addison my name is Addison" the beautiful blonde girl says
"Why r u skipping class In the toilets Addison" I ask
"Why do u care nobody else does so why do u?" She asks as if I'm attacking her
"Because u seem interesting and that's rare for girls around here how old r u" I ask
"I'm almost 13 and u?" She wonders out loud
"I'm 15 so now why r u in here"
"Well because I didn't do my English speech and I also don't want to present it to the class looking like this" she says as if she if ugly like a toad 
"Looking like what u look fine" I complement her but she doesn't notice 
" i have massive bags under my eyes from not being able to sleep from stress" she complains
"I have the perfect solution" I tell her
"What is it" she asks
ADDISON'S BRAIN
Matthew unlocked the door and opened it slightly and looked to make sure No one was there then he grabbed my wrist and ran out the door through the year nine area and out onto the street then through the cross country track and past the neighbourhood where i used to live and to a bunch of trees with a rope going down to what looked like a underground bunker and he pulled me down with him it had fairy lights and two small chairs a table and a couch I was astonished.
Where did u get all this stuff Matthew
"I stole it" he informs me
"What" I was surprised
"I took from people who don't need it" he says
"What why?" I asked
"Wait have u never stole from anyone before?" He looked like he had just seen a ghost
"Um no" I said
"Do it now" he demands
"What ,where from who?" I asked nervously
"The guy across the street his window is always unlocked to his liquor cellar and he's rich so he won't notice" he says
"Fine" I say.
He grabs my arm and pulls me out of the bunker when we got up u wouldn't be able to see there was even something there it was so hidden.
We ran to the rich guys house, Matthew lifted me up through the window and all of the sudden I was surrounded by expansive liquor and I grabbed the one priced $1000 and the 2 priced $899 and climbed back out the window
Then we ran back once we got down to the couch Matthew took the $1000 bottle of tequila and poured some into 2 cups them put all of the liquor into a fridge next to him then he passed me a drink.
"Hey wasn't that fun?" He asks
"Yea I guess" I answer him unsure
"Good, now drink up" he is really bossy.
I took a sip and immediately felt a bunch of memories rush through my brain and think of when I drank at my friends party and we had so much fun I felt kind of sad.
"You up for some fun" Matthew said as he interrupted my thinking,
"Sure" I say back,
He reaches under the coach and pulled a bag of something that looks like marijuana and says "come on let's have some fun grab the rolling paper from the table and pass it to me, you up for it."