I sat in the middle of my living room letting my fingers take over the guitar and my thoughts flood out.
"Quiet when im coming home and im on my own and i could lie and say I like it like that, like it like that."
My mind kept going back to the pain of having to leave places of love or just simply never even getting to be in a place of love. My mind started to rush to the feeling of being pushed down by my dad and I felt a simple tear fall down my cheek.
I screamed, "PTSD IS A FUCKING BITCH." and I stormed to grab my shoes and keys.
"Time for a fucking bike ride, maybe ill stop at the park." I said.
I looked at my guitar and a thought popped into my cloudy mind, you need some extra cash. Lets go play and see if you can collect any.
"FUCK it, why not." I grabbed my guitar and its case and rushed out the door.
I threw my body over my bike with my guitar set on my back and started to peddle. I decided id go to the streets around the grove and see if i could make some cash. It was around 9:30pm and I bet someone would stop and listen.
I made it and locked my bike up against a tree nearby. I set down my case and took out my guitar but made sure to leave the case open just in case someone wanted to maybe place a couple pennys in. Anything would help.
Sometimes playing for people takes the pressure off playing by myself because im not doing it for me. I grabbed my pick and placed the song i wanted to sing in my head. I took my breath and placed my hand upon my guitar.
"And baby when you sleep do you dream of me?
And when you're awake do you think of me?
I need to know, how do you feel?
'Cause baby when I sleep I dream of you
And when I'm awake that's all I do
Think about every detail you have
Do you notice when I get mad I clench my jaw?
Do you notice when I get sad I tend to fall?
Over my words I say to you
Cause I notice when you get mad you close your eyes
And I notice when you are sad you let out sighs
I need to know are those sighs ever over me?
Do you know how in love with you I am?
Do you see how in love with you I am?
Every thing that you do, it makes my heart stop
Oh, it stops
And baby when you sleep do you dream of me?"
I took a lasting breath and realized a gathered quite the crowd. I saw a group of guys, two familys, and a group of girls. There was also one group that was mixed between both genders and they were filming me. It was strange but I oddly liked it, felt validating. I then stared to hear clapping and realized they were applauding me. Me? I was confused. I decided to do a tiny bow and put away my guitar, I only wanted to play one song. I realized everyone had placed money into my case, I was shocked. I packed my stuff up and decided to count it at home. I was coming up from gathering my stuff and felt someone and then i completely rammed into them.
"Omg i'm so sorry." He said.
I saw him, he was one of the people within the mixed group who were filming me. He had the most perfect messy hair I had ever seen and his jawline popped through his facial features. Jawlines are kind of my "fetish" so I wasnt mad at that.
"I'm so sorry as well. Im just a bit cloudy headed and I must have not realized." I said back.
"It was truly my fault. I was going to tap you on the shoulder to say how beautiful you sounded and I didnt realize you were coming up." He said.
"Thank you, well not for ramming into me but for saying how beautiful i sounded." I responded.
"Truly my pleasure. My friends and I were filming you and we would love to shout you out, do you have instagram?" He asked.
"Yes, HarperDior. I know dior, i am no way related to the brand." I chuckled out.
"Well I hope to maybe see you again Harper. I'm Ethan by the way." He said.
"It was nice meeting you Ethan. Even though our greeting was a bit cloudy." I said.
He walked and I saw him join his friends. We had quite the cloudy greeting. I unlocked my bike from the tree and headed home. I felt my phone buzzing the shit out of itself and as soon as I got to my apartment I checked it and it was blowing the fuck up. I saw I had a few DMs and went to it.
Ethandolan mentioned you in his story
_Emmachamberlain mentioned you in her story
Graysondolan mentioned you in his story
Jamescharles mentioned you in his story
I watched the storys and they were of me singing and they all had me tagged and most of them said something like, "SHES A FUCKING GOD AT SINGING. we were just walking and fucking around and heard her and bam. She needs a fucking grammy." one of them said "shes got swag in her voice." and the last one which was posted by ethan said, "gorgeous voice and gorgeous girl I happened to hear and ram into."
"He called me gorgeous." I said to myself.
I felt my cheeks warm and have that tingle feeling spread through my whole body.
I clicked on his account and saw he had, 7.7M followers.
"Holy fucking shit." I said.
YOU ARE READING
cloudy love | ethan dolan
Fanfiction"It was nice meeting you Ethan. Even though our greeting was a bit cloudy." I said.
