Saviors [A SVU and Bensler Fan Fic]

[Chapter Seventy-Nine]

I went into work later the next day, because I just needed more sleep. When I called John and told him, he said it was okay because I'm only on desk duty anyway. But when I arrived at the precinct and walked into the squad room, there was a bouquet of flowers on my desk. I walked towards them and picked up the note before unfolding it and reading it.

Liv,

I know that you had a rough night last night, but you will do great no matter if you are working in the field or on desk duty. You might be forgetting your parents now, but you will always still know that they loved you so much, and you will still remember the day they adopted you, just like Christopher will always remember the day we adopted him. I love you, Livvie. No matter what.

El

Tears ran down my cheeks, and I quickly brushed them away before sitting down.

"So, Liv, John said you have something to tell me?" Fin asked as he sat on the edge of my desk.

"Oh, uh, I'm pregnant." I breathed, and Fin nodded.

"Oh, that's cool. Uh, so your a bench warmer now?"

"Yup. Till the baby comes, which is like in 26 weeks."

"But, Liv, I'm gonna be here for several weeks after you have your kid, and you are gonna be home with it."

"Don't worry. I still have plenty of time to annoy you. And you never know, there might be another detective coming in to be your partner while I'm sitting here doing the research and taking calls."

"Just remember, baby girl, you will always be my partner, and whoever may come through to take your spot, will never be able to actually take your spot," Fin smirked, before standing and walking to the coffee pots.

[*]

On Sunday, Elliot and I took Christopher out to his parents' house to tell them that I was pregnant. Only Louisa was going to be able to be there, but just like when it came to John, we needed to tell them sooner rather than later or else Christopher might just tell them before we get a chance.

So once we got there, we sent Christopher out to play with Louisa's dog, Gunner, and we just blurted it out.

"Elliot and I are having a baby."

"What?" Bernie asked as she stared at us. It was really random, but you kinda have to tell them quickly because if we didn't, our little 4 year old would come sprinting in telling his grandparents that he was going to have a baby brother or sister.

"Liv's pregnant. And I know we should've planned something out, but Christopher knows and is beyond excited so it makes more sense to do this right now instead of in half an hour when he tells you. So, Liv is 14 weeks pregnant, and we got the all clear. The day before we head to Maine is the day we can find out the gender of the baby." Elliot spoke, as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

"That's... amazing." Louisa smiled, as she quickly ran to us. She hugged us both, before stepping back and smiling at me.

"Thanks," I spoke, before looking at Bernie and Joseph.

"Is it okay that we are having a baby? Or is there something we don't know?" Elliot asked, and Bernie frowned.

"Josephine found out yesterday that she and Bobby can't have kids... it's just a little bad timing." Bernie frowned. She and Joseph walked into the kitchen, and I turned to look at Elliot.

"Uh, I don't know what to do now," I whispered, and he nodded.

"Maybe we should go home," Elliot spoke, and I nodded slowly. I turned to Louisa and shrugged.

"Thanks for being happy for us. Uh, do you think I should call her?" I mused, and she nodded.

"Josie will be happy for you both, but might not be right now. But congrats. I'll go get Chrissy and bring him to the car for you."

"Okay, thanks."

[*]

Christopher was extremely disappointed that we couldn't stay for dinner, so I called Cynthia when we stopped for gas, and I asked her to order a pizza and maybe find one of Christopher's favorites movies so we could make it up to him.

"So, we are gonna eat pizza and watch movies," I spoke, as I pushed my phone into my pocket and leaned against our car.

"I just hate to disappoint our kid." Elliot frowned, as he reached over and tucked some hair behind my ear.

"I know, I do too. I think we need to talk to Josie and Bobby soon."

"Should we not be happy?" Elliot asked, and I frowned deeply.

"No idea. Like, we are having a baby, and we are both excited. But maybe we should just dial it back a bit. So we don't make them feel bad. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay. Let's just get this kid home and feed him. And I bet you are starving too." Elliot smiled softly, before leaning over and kissing me.

"I may be the pregnant one, but you still eat more than me. You are the starving one."

[*]

During one of my lunch breaks, I asked Josephine out to lunch. When she showed up, and she looked exhausted and emotionally drained. It made me so upset to know that someone so great can't have a baby... it really made me feel like Elliot and I don't deserve a baby.

"Have you slept?" I asked after we hugged. We started to sit down, and she frowned and shook her head.

"No. Not really." She sighed.

"Josie, I know that you've been told that there is adoption and having someone be your surrogate, but I can get you in contact with Chrissy's old caseworker."

"I just want a baby." She whimpered, before grabbing the napkin and dabbing at her tears.

"I know you do," I whispered. I ran my hands through my hair before grabbing my water and taking a drink from it.

"Josie, can I ask you a question?"

"I guess. I don't know if it'll be an answer you'll like."

"Oh, nevermind then." I frowned, before picking up the menu.

"No, come on Liv."

"No, because I don't want to make you feel bad. Let's eat something."

Josephine and I talked for a bit, but I didn't have the balls to tell her that I was pregnant. I just felt so bad, and bringing up something that made me happy, would make her feel like absolute shit.

"So you just wanted to eat lunch with me?" Josephine asked, and I nodded slowly.

"Yeah..."

"What did you want to ask earlier?"

"If you would be okay if someone else had a baby... but it's a stupid question."

"Who's having a baby?"

"I am," I whispered, before pulling her into a hug and walking away.

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