Gonna Be the Death of Me (adopted by Brendon Urie)

//forty - stopping to think of you//

Song of the Chapter: "Wish You Were Here," Neck Deep

Eva practically threw herself onto Theo, holding him so tightly against her like it was her last chance, mainly because sometimes, she was scared that everything was her last chance to do anything. He didn't know that though, he just knew that he missed her and her voice and the covers she would do on tour. "Hey baby," he whispered quietly, running one hand through her hair as she dug her face into his neck and cried. "I missed you. So much. More than you'll ever know" the crying girl whimpered, trying to keep her sentences even with the tears falling down her face. "I missed you just the same." She knew he would never understand the kind of missing she was feeling right now, which is why she was so scared to talk to him and Alex. Theo picked her up and spun her around, kissing her gently and guiding her towards Alex. She clung onto him tightly, him whispering about how nothing was the same without her around. Everything they were saying was as if they already knew, but she knew that they had no clue just how bad it's gotten.

They both knew something. She stopped singing in the last tour dates, no longer getting on stage or even talking to fans afterwards like she always loved doing. They both saw that she was never online anymore and barely texted either of them, let alone called or FaceTimed. Theo also felt how light she was, lighter than ever before. They knew something was off, but had no clue what the truth was.

Eva had talked to Brendon and he said that it was her choice of when to tell them everything. Knowing that sooner was better than later, she pulled both of her best friends from the room after they'd greeted everyone. The three talked for awhile, cracking jokes and catching up on school drama. Alex and Theo both noticed how she barely looked up and how when she laughed it seems forced. "So E," Alex started, looking over to Theo before continuing. "What's going on recently? Like, really?" The blue haired girl looked up, biting her lip and switching her gaze from each boys eyes.

"Something happened. I couldn't tell you over the phone." They both nodded for her to continue and she could already feel the panic well inside of herself. "A day or two before we went to the UK, I was standing in the bud lot looking through social media. I was reading the hate blogs about me, completely lost in it all." Theo was on the edge of his seat, praying the outcome of the anecdote was much better than he was anticipating. Alex watched her carefully and calmly. She took another deep and shaky breath before continuing.

"The next thing I knew, I looked up and I was a few feet away from busy traffic, almost getting hit with a car. I jumped back and called my doctor immediately, then called Vic to come." Both boys sat there in shock. Alex was cautiously watching her, more worried that the seemingly endless shake in her hands was getting worse than about the story. Theo on the other hand was out of his seat, pacing around the room and chewing in his nails. "I didn't want to, I didn't even know I was doing it. I'm going to see my doctor tomorrow afternoon. But, it may be bad guys."

Theo continued to pace, only make Eva more nervous. "Why didn't you call me?" he asked quietly, fear detectable. "Because I could hardly focus. I didn't know what to do or say. Everything for days afterwards was either completely blank stares or endless emotions."

"We have a right to know Eva. You should have told us." His voice was calm but you could see the panic and almost anger at the situation settling in his eyes. "I know, but I barely understand what happened Theo. I know you guys care about me and want to know, but I had to figure it all out first." Theo stood there, tears playing on the brims of his eyes. "I should have known. You stopped singing, stopped meeting fans, you weigh hardly anything. I should have known. But no one will ever know anything unless you tell us Eva." With that, he was out of the room, running through the backstage.

Alex leaned forward and pulled her into a hug. She latched onto him and tried to even out her breathing. She felt lightheaded and dizzy. "He needs to process. This isn't your fault. It would have been nice to know but I know why you didn't tell us yet. He's not mad at you, he's just mad at the world." Eva nodded slowly, unable to really make out anything in the surroundings. "Alex," she muttered, losing breath more and more. "I can't, breathe. Tony," she rushed out, desperate to gain control. Alex sprung up and ran out, Tony coming in quickly afterwards. "Okay E, you know what to do. Just breathe with me." Bad anxiety attacks like this weren't becoming exactly common but she had a few similar to this in the past week or two.

After twenty minutes, she could finally feel less dizzy. "Thank you Tone." He nodded and smiled. "Theo is calming down now, he was really overwhelmed. He wanted to wait to come back until you felt better. Are you better now?" Eva nodded as Tony stood up and sent Theo in, Alex close behind. Theo came over and hugged her, muttering apologies into her hair quietly as she forgave him over and over. The three sat like that for awhile, eventually walking out to see the show from side stage. "I don't know what's going to happen at the doctors tomorrow."

Theo looked over at her, the shadows from being backstage overcasting her face. "No matter what, we'll always be here." He took her hand and kissed it, pulling her into his side as they watched the show. She felt at peace, but deep down, she knew something serious was going to happen the next day.