Trigger warning
I'm so fucking broken
my breath shakes
my whole body shakes
i want to dig my nails into my hands
until they bleed
fuck
i've been clean for fucking years
4 fucking years
and yet over nothing
im ready to ruin it all
i crave the pain
it might be better then fucking crying
over an old friend
who was toxic
over the fact that i let myself get into that position in the first place
fuck
i'm an idiot
i can't even ask for help
i'm the strong one
i don't break
my bad days never happen
the amount of people who believe that i'm okay
is a little scary because
what if they learn the truth
and they leave
i always doubt they'll stay
no one ever does
