pequeña despotricar

october tenth twenty-eighteen

the first part is the original and the second part is the same just in all caps to show that i'm yelling this in my mind.  

10-26-18

i'm like the stupidest person. i don't know how to speak correctly. i do it say stupid shit to my mother that makes her mad. i do things that look like i'm asking for attention when i don't. i feel like the stupidest person in my family. i've ruined two of the greatest friendships i've ever had. i feel so stupid. if i wasn't so stupid i'd still have those two friends. i feel too stupid to be at the school i'm at right now. i feel stupid around my peers and not only in my core classes all of my classes. pe and leadership and bible and spanish. i feel so stupid. i feel like i should be in the fucking 1st grade. i hate feeling stupid. i hate doing stupid shit.

10/26/18

IM LIKE THE STUPIDEST PERSON. I DONT KNOW HOW TO SPEAK CORRECTLY. I DO IT SAY STUPID SHIT TO MY MOTHER THAT MAKES HER MAD. I DO THINGS THAT LOOK LIKE IM ASKING FOR ATTENTION WHEN I DONT. I FEEL LIKE THE STUPIDEST PERSON IN MY FAMILY. I'VE RUINED TWO OF THE GREATEST FRIENDSHIPS I'VE EVER HAD. I FEEL SO STUPID. IF I WASNT SO STUPID ID STILL HAVE THOSE TWO FRIENDS. I FEEL TOO STUPID TO BE AT THE SCHOOL IM AT RIGHT NOW. I FEEL STUPID AROUND MY PEERS AND NOT ONLY IN MY CORE CLASSES. PE AND LEADERSHIP AND BIBLE AND SPANISH. I FEEL SO STUPID. I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD BE IN THE FUCKING 1ST GRADE. I HATE FEELING STUPID. I HATE DOING STUPID SHIT.