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12. Eddie's POV

TRIGGER TRIGGER TRIGGER :)

When Richie leaves, Bev returns to the room confused.

"Where's Rich?" I shake my head, trying to keep the conversation out of my mind. I'm so stupid.

"He left," I mumbled. "Its all my fault." She silently walks to the couch, right where Richie was sitting.

"What do you mean?"

I take the popcorn that Richie made out of the microwave and poured it in a green bowl.

"There was..." I begin. Should I tell Bev? "A thing. And I ended it." She stares at me in shock.

"Richie? Gay? Never would've thunk it." She stands up and walks into the kitchen where I stand.

"Why?" She asks. Another tear falls down my face.

"I just wanna go back home," I cry. She doesn't look at me with sympathy.

"Y'know, when I told my mom I was bi, she literally left the house. I couldn't tell my dad, and that's why I live with him. Eddie, you can't be pushed around because of your sexuality, okay? Take all the time you need here, and go back. If she doesn't accept you for the way you are, then just call her out on the piece of shit that she is." I shake my head even more.

"She sent me to the hospital, Bev. They put restraints on me." She doesn't say anything. "I am the only guy that is even a little gay in this fucking world!" I slam my hand on the counter.

"No, you're not. Richie. And, I'm not supposed to tell you this, but Bill and Stan are kind of a thing. You think they don't feel the same way as you do right now? What's stopping you from having a thing with Rich?" I contemplate this.

"So, uhm, most of the Losers are gay?" She laughs.

"Pretty much, except for Ben and Mike." Her smile lights up the dim room.

"Thank you, Bev." She smiles even greater.

"Now, you go get my stoner back here." I nod, and head to the door. Walking past Derry's Main street, I walk past Henry Bowers and his gang, far enough to where they don't notice me. I walk towards 13th street, and Richie's house is in sight.

I knock on the door, but nobody answers, so I decide to let myself in. I race up the stairs, feeling suddenly nervous, and enter his room. Empty, I head to the bathroom. I knock, hoping he isn't in there, but he yells "Come in!"

I slightly open the door and see him on the floor, wearing nothing but a towel that covers his... underside, next to a shoebox. His eyes are bloodshot, his nose is bleeding with white powder all over it, the room smelling with marijuana. He holds a razor, and my breathing hitches.

"Chee! What happened?" He laughs hysterically. I grab the razor out of his hands frantically, cutting my finger. I run into his room and call Bev.

"Hello?"

"Bev, he's high. Like, cocaine high. And he was holding a fucking razor. Bev!" I freak out.

"I'll be right over," she mumbles, and hangs up.

I walk back to him, resting my hand on his bare, scrawny chest.

"You know," he slurs. "You know I'll always come back to you. No reason in pushing me away, Eds." He laughs some more, and I feel tears.

Am I the only thing keeping him alive?

I pick him up, accidentally revealing what was under the towel... and throw him into his bed. He grabs my hair as he falls from my hold, and I fall down with him. He kisses me, and for a moment, I forget everything happening. I just kiss him back.

"Tell your mom she's a living piece of shit," he mumbles. "Get your fucking house back."

"Okay, Rich."

"I know you weren't telling the truth," he giggles. "You're so gay!" His eyes close, and he starts snoring. I find a broken piece of a mirror lying on the floor and hold it to his face to make sure he's still breathing.

"I know," I mumble. Bev runs in frantically.

"Is he okay?" I nod. She grabs the razor out of my hand

"Yeah," I whisper. Bev takes the shoebox lying on the bathroom floor and opens it. Pills, marijuana, cocaine, and several other drugs are stored in the shoebox.

"Rich," I whisper.

Bev leaves the room with the shoebox, signaling that it's time to leave. I grab the gray comforter spread on the ground and lay it on Richie's body.

"I'll come back to you," I whisper, barely audible.

The chapters are getting so short ugh
Listen to the song while you read it creates the super tense vibes
Yeah I cried a lil
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