Dear Robert,
Paano kaya ako makakamove-on sayo? It's been what, 2-3 weeks since I last saw you before tonight? And it's been almost decade of cherishing you in my heart. Shems...
Ang korni.
Naaalala mo kaya ako noon, after you left? Ako kasi tandang-tanda ko pa kung kelan ako nahulog sayo.
* * * * *
''Ui, Belle, tara sa canteen. Kain tayo,'' aya sakin ni Lea.
"Ah, hindi. Busog pa kasi ako, nag-almusal kasi ako kanina sa bahay eh. Salamat nalang," tanggi ko sa kanya.
I was left alone in the room. I read some advance topics on Science, skimmed notes on other subjects. When all of the sudden my solitude is disrupted by someone.
It's he.
Since he disturbed my silence, he also got my attention. Imbes tuloy na notes ko ang pagtuunan ng pansin, titigan at pag-aralan. Nasa kanya na ang buong atensyon ko.
He sat comfortably on the teacher's chair. He seems oblivious on his surrounding. Ni hindi nya ata alam na nakatunganga ako sa kanya.
After awhile, his stare went to mine. Our eyes met and for a moment, it felt like the clock stops ticking, the world cease to move, the birds stop chirping, the environment halted and froze for the time being.
"Ano, pre? Staring game ba nilalaro nyo?" putol ni Kristoff sa moment namin.
And broke it, nasa school na ulit kami. Akala ko napunta kami sa space wrap.
I blinked and bowed my head.
Nakakahiya...
Alam ko sa sarili ko na namula ako. So, I pretended nothing happened. Inayos ang eyeglasses ko at itinapat sa mukha ang libro.
I tried to bring back my attention to the book I was reading earlier. I tried, very apt. But I failed, miserably. Cause my whole being is tensed because of him. His presence sends this tingly sensation. These deliciously dangerous feelings.
And at that moment I knew, I fell. Hard. Deep. Madly.
And surely. I knew, this would last. 'Til when? Until this heart loses hope.
* * * * *
I would always notice you. There's this delectable signal that I would always feel whenever you would be near. Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit kahit ang tagal nang ganito ako sayo, hindi pa rin ako nasasanay.
Hindi pa rin ako nasasanay kapag alam kong nasa malapit ka, yung puso ko grabe. Grabe yung kabog, but the thing is, you're not doing anything.
As in, wala. Wala ung mga usual na kilig something moments. You were never a "someone"; yes, you were "someone special" to me; but never "someone". You get the gist?
We're not even friends, we're merely acquaintances. And, neither of us decide to cross the line towards the next level.
Ahahahaha. I don't know why, siguro kasi mukha akong mahiyain nun, I was one of those nerdy girls you never got yourself involve will.
You always struck me as someone mysterious and I may appeared shy and timid. However, I know how to converse. But, never with you.
And that's what I regret the most. A chance to have a conversation with you.
* * * * *
"Here's your registration," sabi ng registrar habang inaabot ang form sakin.
