Losing you

Nathan & Katie.

The heat of sun beaming through windows hit my face, making my sleep deprived eyes flicker open. Feeling an unusual soreness of my muscles, I tried to stretch but immediately stiffened finding an arm around my waist.

What the?

Just like that my residual sleep vanished.

My panic was shortlived though. Once my sleep cleared, I realised I am in Nate's room. My lips curled into an involuntary smile as events from lastnight came rushing.

I slowly turned in Nate's arm to face him and my heart filled with warmth like always.

I saw Nate for the first time at the age of 5, when teacher made me sit beside him and fate made my new house sit beside his dad's. Mom hoped a new town would make us start anew after dad's death but we got more than we asked for.

Nate's parents were divorced. His custody was given to his mom who lived in other side of town. Since she kept herself drowned in drugs most of time, Nate mostly stayed with his dad.

When I was 9 year old, our parents announced that they were going to get married. We were on cloudnine because that meant Nate and I get to be roommates afterall.

Soon after the marraige, his mothers conditioned worsened. For some unknown reason, she always hated Jon and through this marraige, me and my mom became subjects of her hatred too.

It killed Nate though, to watch his mother go through all this. He loved his mom and so did she. She may not be the best of mothers but Nate is all she had.

Days passed and my feelings towards him started to change. Instead of looking at him as my best friend or half-brother, I started seeing him for a man he is becoming.

Accidental touches lead to fluttering of heart, random words lead to butterflies in belly. I knew he felt it too, but we never acted on it, afraid of consequences it would bring on what we had. And I knew it was wrong. Even though we aren't related by blood and never considered the other person as a sibling, we know society will frown upon us if we were to be together.

Few days back, our parents surprised us again by saying us that they wanted to seperate. Nate's mom went into severe depression few days back attempted to kill herself. She wanted Jon back and threatened to do it again if he didnt leave my mom. My parents said they did not love each other anymore, atleast not enough to risk another person's life. They said the major reason they got married is me and Nate. So that we can have each other. I know the news should have made me sad, but it did not. I love Jon. But I could never consider him as my dad. I was always happy for the fact that he never even wanted to replace my dad. I could say that's the reason I was not too sad about their seperation news. That would be a lie though. I was more happy about the fact that Nate is not my step-brother anymore. There are still many things between us but if my parents are not married anymore, may be... just maybe one of the major hurdle will be crossed.

Years of bottled up feelings finally caught upon us yesterday night though. Two days back, mom and Jon left to spend their holiday at beachhouse for their one last time together.

We sat on couch, him spread on it and me curled into him, and started our evening binge. After awhile feeling his stare on me, I lifted my head to face him. The moment our eyes locked, I was totally lost in the raw intensity they held.

Desire burning in them was so bright that it blinded me momentarily. He slowly leaned down claiming my lips and I immediately melted into his kiss. My heart sped as I kissed back, falling into rhythm of his sweetlips. It soon escalated from kissing to making out, then progressed to further. Our minds, clouded by desire, longed to be closer and closer untill we finally gave into it, entering a world of passion.