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2:30am
jeongguk;
i walked out of my house and looked up at the star-filled sky. i remember running away from home during the ungodly hours of the night just to lay in the park bench to look up at the white dots speckled in the dark canvas up above. truly beautiful, aren't they?
i always found myself trying to escape the harsh reality which was my house. not my home, but my house. i've never had a home and it seems to me i'm not finding one anytime soon.
why would i always try to escape? simple. i hated my fucking dad. i can still vividly remember what he told me one night when i was 7 years old,
"you're gonna become just like me, if not, better."
it always plays in my head like a broken record over and over again. i knew my dad killed, that's why my mom left us. she couldn't handle the fact that he killed people – whether it was a means of survival or just for fun. she didn't want to be associated with a psychopathic killer anymore, she could only tolerate so much. at least that's what my dad told me.
i love my mom, i really do. i just don't know who she is or where she could be. she left after i was born and ever since then, my dad has always raised me to be just like him – a fucking killer.
by age 4, i already knew how to handle a knife. by age 5, i was taught self-defence, and the rest of my life leading up to now is history, baby.
my dad only showed me a worn out picture of her, but i can tell that he still loves her every time he talks about the lady. she had long brown hair that reached just above her breasts, a fair complexion and her eyes appeared like thin lines because of the way she smiled in the photo. her eyes were almost shaped like crescents, and one last noticeable thing was the fact that she was shorter than my father by about a whole foot and a half.
he told me he was gonna do everything in his power to get her back, but he never did. she cut off all ties with him and he didn't know where to find her.
because of that, he strictly trains me. when i make a mistake, he beats me, but when i do good, he tells me i can do better. there were times he lost control and he beat me until i couldn't get up and one time, he even drove a knife so deep in my thigh, it left a huge scar. i can still feel how painful it was.
he's dead now though. had a heart attack in the middle of taking a shower and i had to take his body and throw it in a river. somewhere far so no one could see and no one will ever notice. see, that was another thing i remember he told me. if he died, i were to bury him or i don't know, throw his body in a river somewhere which was what i did.
despite my thoughts running amok, i knew exactly where i was going.
jimin's house.
oh god, that boy. where do i even begin with him? he's perfect, in every way possible – his fluffy cotton candy coloured hair, his plump, pink lips, and his voice that always sends me to cloud nine.
the moment i saw him, i had to have him. no one was gonna get in the way of what i want, what i need.
not even seokjin, that roommate of his. he's already suspicious of me and probably won't let me near jimin, or if he does, he'll keep a close eye. i don't wanna kill him, not yet, but at some point i swear to god i will if he really gets in the way.
i stopped in front of the house, my hands in the pocket of my black hoodie. i was about to walk the other way when the door swung open and out walked jimin carrying a garbage bag.
"jeongguk? is that you?" i heard his sweet voice call out.
i took my hands out of the pocket and slid the hoodie back to reveal my face.
"jiminie, hi." i waved and walked towards him, my hands making their way into my jean pockets.
"what are you doing here?"
"oh you know, i was just having a little stroll." i awkwardly scratched the back of my head and chuckled.
"this late? are you insane?"
perhaps.
"ah, i like going out for late night walks i guess."
jimin's mouth formed an 'o' shape and his head tilted back and he nodded to acknowledge what i said.
"i know i shouldn't be doing this, but do you wanna come inside?"
i furrowed my eyebrows, clearly confused. "aren't i like sort of forbidden here now?", he just shrugged and walked past me, tossing the garbage bag he was carrying into the bin.
"well if you don't want to then i guess i'll just see you at school on monday?"
i nodded and put my hood back up.
"i'll see you at school jiminie, sleep well."
he shot me a small smile before going back inside and closing the door.
