New Beginning || JJK

Chapter 4 ,,fears"

Y/N pov
I woke up in the hospital bed with someone holding my hand.
I got up a little to check who it is.
My head started to ache.
,,M-Mark? What happend and what are yo-"
He cut off my words with a kiss.
My eyes widden in shock.
I broke the kiss and looked at him.
,,What happend?"
He had red, puffy and swollen eyes.
,,You had an accident, my love. You are fine now" he told me with a cracking voice

Marks pov
Flashback
I was on my way to Y/N i wanted to surprise her.
HaEun told me how worried she was.
My phone started ringing and I checked who it was.
,,Rose (my ex)"
I didn't focus on the road for a second.
I crashed into someone.
I got out of the car to check if the person was OK.
The body was surrounded by a lake of blood... then...
I saw her face and without hesitation i called an ambulance...
,,Y/N i'm so sorry" I whispered before starting to cry...

End of the flashback

,,I was scared that I might lose you... don't ever do that. Please don't do that again" I started sobbing uncontrollable.
She looked at me with worried eyes.
,,Mark... Hey... I'm sorry I didn't pay attention." She gave me a weak but cute smile to tell me that she's fine.
I kissed her again.
My mind was full of worries and hate...
I hate myself..
I brought her in danger.
But if she finds out that it was me hitting her with the car and that I didn't pay attention on the road because of Rose... with the girl I cheated on her with.. s-she would leave me...
There's no posibility that she wouldn't leave...

Y/N pov

He's here with me... and he's holding my hand...
But why does it feel so wrong.
When he kisses me I feel butterflies in my stomach but my heart is breaking...
What is this...

My biggest fear is it to be alone but is this considered a fake love... is it? 
No.. there is no way.. because I love him.
It's not fake.
,,Mark, please call HaEun and Hope"
He called them and they said that they are in their way to the hospital.
We heard a knock on the door and I thought this could be HaEun and Hope but the door opend and it revealed the doctor.
,,Mrs Min, You had real luck.
Your boyfriend had a good timing"

What does he mean by good timing. I looked at Mark with a confused gaze...  he held my hand and gave me a cute little smile...
HaEun and Hope arrived and they ran to my bed.
,,U-Unnie how are you? " Hope said with a tint of worry in her quiet but cute voice.
HaEun looked at me with teary eyes and tried to avoid my eyes.
,,i feel perfectly fine. Like always"
I smiled at them feeling like I'm dying inside.
They shouldn't know how I feel.
I'm their Unnie... They shouldn't worry.. that breaks my heart.

,,Y/N-Unnie... do you still want to study dance? I mean.. I don't know maybe you have a trauma and you forgot..." HaEun said with a cute look on her face.
I started laughing like an idot and said yes.
,,You decided what you want to become?" Mark asked with a nervous voice
I nodded slightly to tell him yes.
He hugged me and whispered something...
,,I'm so proud of you Princess"
I giggled and for a moment I forgot all the pain I've ever felt...
Until my fears hit me again...

I should let go of him.
B-but being alone is like dying alone in my case...
Because I'm slowly dying from the pain but not telling anyone...
I love him...
Or... maybe...
My eyes started to get watery again. I looked at him for a second and kissed him slowly.
The only thing I felt was just the pain of being let go... and being alone again.
I parted and saw him smiling.
He whiped away my tears and I smiled at him...

,,You should rest babe" Mark said with a caring voice.
I nodded and told him and my friends goodbye.

Great Y/N... here you are.. in the hospital still fighting against your thoughts and fears...
But your fears are winning...
Why? Because you're alone again

Without realizing it hot tears streamed down my face and I cried myself to sleep again

____________________________________

Hey
I know, I know there's a little too much drama and confusion.
But you know what?
I like drama. :)♡
Keep smiling and stay healthy.
Saranghaeyo
~Author-nim