I just wanted to have a peaceful summer vacation on the beach and by now if we were being idealistic soft and cool breezes should be blowing on my face but in reality I've been bitten by a mosquito already 10th time this day and the weather seems to change drastically every hour. Also I was sunburnt despite of applying my sunscreen. What a great way start your summer holiday!
I decided to call it a day and rest in my hotel room. As I was walking in the lobby towards my room, I accidentally bumped into a man causing the juice in my hand to spill on my beautiful dress," WHAT NOW!?" I released the anger I have been holding inside but immediately felt regretful for venting it out on someone who didn't do anything wrong and apologised, " Ah I'm so sorry, I just had a terrible day you understand and I didn't mean to--" I stopped mid sentence when I looked up at the face of the victim of my unjustified anger. "Heol,Sungjae-sunbaenim, I never thought you would be vacationing here as well!" Lies, Park Sooyoung you searched for his vacation destination and decided coming to this spot in hopes of running into him somehow.
"How did you know I was here for a vacation?"
"Btob's on a hiatus."
"Well I could be on my individual schedule too, you know"
"Are you?"
"No, but what are you doing here and what's with the formality, don't pretend like we didn't share 11 happy months together just sometime ago." Ok so you're going to be THAT straightforward, okay, fine Sungjae.
"I came to release my stress but it seems like I've only gotten more since I arrived here,-" I completed the sentence observing that he has gotten the wrong idea judging from his confused eyebrows,"- no, no it's not you, just the damn mosquitoes and the sun."
"Shall we go somewhere we can talk more comfortably instead of standing here in this lobby."
"Ah of course, let's go to my room."
ARE YOU REALLY THAT NAIVE AND OBLIVIOUS SOOYOUNG-AH, inviting someone into your room like this, of course it wasn't just anyone, it was him but still, his mind screamed as he just looked with a confused expression towards the girl who was innocently and beemingly draging him by linking their arms together, suddenly it felt like 3 years haven't happened at all,like he was back in 2015, when he looked at her being the cute little smiley kid she had been, it's like she never changed, it was so different to anything of her he has seen on the stages or on tv. Sooyoung-ah had always been slightly different than Joy, the cold and unapproachable aura of Hot Joy of Red Velvet that everybody's so used to seeing onscreen melts the instant she returns to her normal life.
It seemed like she was afterall the same 20 year old girl he fell in love with during wgm, ouch that's right, that happened, that not-to-be-named thing did happen, he's not even sure if he hides it well or not because everytime he meets a sunbae they inquire him about it.
Of course she is bringing Fitz on the tray aside from the chips, it's the beer from the cf she did with one of her drama costars Woo Dohwan.
"Haha you're a good endorser" He admitted clinking his bottle with hers.
"At least I'm not as obvious as a certain someone who endorses Samsung."
It seemed like the distance and time between them had never existed when they started talking, and the beer helped them to loosen up more to each other.
"Do you miss me sometimes?"
"All the time." the ever so honest and straightforward park sooyoung confessed casually like it was the most normal thing to do.
"I did too."
"Then why did we decide to live so miserably,not contacting each other, I wonder now." she laughed hysterically and he was not sure if she was in her senses right now, he knew she had a high alcohol tolerance but the way she was speaking her mind seemed like the act of a drunk person.
"Because we are 2 scared kids, we are scaredy cats."
"Ani Oppa we have a sense of responsibility. I just-- I just all along wanted you to know that you shouldn't regret fulfilling your responsibilities, to not have a hard time while working because---- I mean if you felt sorry towards me--I understand you" she slurred on her last words as if she wasn't so sure about his heart.
There goes his Sooyoung-ah speaking wisely, being an intellectual person above her age, well that's probably why she succeeded in this harsh and competitive industry. She has always been this understanding of him, however that only makes him more sorry and regretful as always, just like when she confessed about mustering all her courage for their first meeting to fit his ideal type on the last ep.
However one thing upsetted and angered him but again he only found himself to blame for it, she doubted his heart, if only he would have confessed or reassured her every year after wgm was over.
He looked at the girl laying beside him who was now staring at the ceiling, how could he leave her, this girl that he's so comfortable with, this girl who knows how to make him happy just by existing, this girl that cares about him, loves him, this girl that knows him so damn well but ironically still is unsure of his heart. She was still the girl he had been searching for in the crowds on the stage, in the rain, in the songs he sang, in the meanings of the dreams he had, he had searched for her but he always hesitated to approach her, he distanced himself eventhough he was longing for her, because he was in a process of discovering himself, of growing, of confusion and hardwork and he didn't want to approach her in his confused and unstable state.
And he once again internally cursed himself for not being good at expressing his emotions. No matter how good this girl, this woman beside her maybe at reading his silence, she isn't a telepath and needs to hear certain words, that only he can say.
"I'm sorry I gave you a hard time, I was a little bit too selfish.I was just too focused on finding myself that I unconsciously disregarded certain important things in life."
"It's okay, I know now you were hurting too. You know I'll never be mad at you for focusing on your growth. Besides I wouldn't want to marry a dense brat who has no clue about his direction in life." Again she was the first one to bring up the subject of marriage, she always seems to be one step ahead of him.
"How can you agree to marry me without a proposal?"
"It's not my fault you're too slow that I ruin your plans." she laughed weakly
"Hmmm I guess reality is different from dramas and movies.Ok eventhough you didn't ask for my consent while talking about our marriage it's a yes from me."
"Yayy can't believe Oppa is mine now kkkkkk,--" she said hugging him like a fool in love because well she was one indeed."-- but are you really ready for marriage Oppa."
"Ready whenever you are love, ready whenever you are." he caressed her face,"you know Sooyoungah fate has a funny way to pull me back to you, I think I should just keep me beside you from now, and well I was going to ask but honestly who are we kidding by the way you are cuddling me it doesn't seem like you are particularly against the idea of being my fiancee."
"I'm yours." She said smiling," but honestly Yook this is going to be the first engagement in history without rings or anything of that sort."
"It was the most unexpected as well but not surprising at all all the same I think.I don't think we are a normal couple either but who needs rings when we have sincere feelings in the play, right? Now come let me buy you something, oh well I think I might already have it in my backpack."
She waited half expecting it to be a ring, her eyes gleaming in hope.
"There you go, here's this ointment for the mosquito bites."
That's right he had no way of knowing she would be here because she only came here AFTER he did, reality was different than movies, it didn't have plot-holes like this, only gaps that needed to be filled, and today the gaps between her fingers were full,clasping his giant hand, she laughed at her somewhat foolish thought.
To say the least, they slept peacefully that night.
