Songs of Milan

Message Man ✉️

how could i even begin to tell the world about you..?

just friends close hearts and open legs, catch feelings and seek for solitude in one another's loneliness, one sided..set a fire between lonely friends.. burned out into one worded text replies, one missed call after another, lost communication.. am i wrong? let me know.. felt so right to let things go, found someone new.. happy with someone new.. "i miss you.. what happened to (us)" text .. did the cruelest thing one could.. lit a fire in our hearts and gave our minds hope.. hope, such a selfish concept.. born between two friends.. dismissed all claims and fed the blame to the message man .

tell me my former friend, what is it that you found in a such a "friend" that turned devilish and ate away at your core, was it my willingness to numb my mind and abide to your temptations, or was it something in my smile that you found to be infectious, was it my quiet participation to this game you loved.. it was never fun, was it because i made you feel anew? or was it because i allowed you to linger in places you never asked permission to enter, to touch and stretch as much as you chose with no limits? what made this "friendship" become so vital.. what hurt you.. just asking for a "friend"

cross fade a vivid screenplay, slow it down and introduce my faults

what day was it, what did i say or do that brought you back to me hidden beneath wrapping paper as a threat to my heart?

  i can't lie and say i wasn't surprised by your sudden rejection to my affection, the rush of insecurities forming in my eyes, the false sincerity projected from your voice, hadn't expected it, didn't have enough time to prepare my heart to be placed back into my hands torched at the edges

  you were cold last night, so cold, i felt my shield breaking down slowly as each picture replayed in my mind, the way your laugh echoed through my ears made me feel weaker and weaker, i'd be lying if i said i haven't cried over you, that evading sleep some nights hasn't become a routine resonating from the fear that by the morning you'll be gone.. that it's seldom i lose focus with constant thoughts of you, that i haven't contemplated sharing my soul and broken being with you, that i've never been cornered with fear of someone else being able to give all that you couldn't find in me, that i've never allowed the fallen tears to turn red, that the weight of your words never shook my core, that i've grown too strong

  i'd be lying if i said i haven't let you inside.. that you haven't gotten to me.. that i don't sometimes find myself regretting the thought of you, i'd be lying if i said i haven't dropped my pride.. if i said i haven't forced a smile to mask my sorrow from the uncertainty of your emotions.

Part Two.