My Life- A Lie, Myself- An Illusion (short story)

My Life- A Lie, Myself - An Illusion

Hurriedly I followed the street in between the dazzlingly lit Christkindlmarkt-stalls (picture). The cold wind blew snowflakes into my face and I held my arms tightly around my shivering body.I pulled my scarf deeper into my face, until it covered my nose. Christmas-songs were playing and a warm punch-scent flowed towards me.

What should I buy Amber and Christine? And I still needed something for Jessy and my boyfriend. So many things, so little time.What asshole invented Christmas presents?! This somebody better should hope, that we will never meet...

After some time, I saw a beggar sitting in the snow, her hood and scarf pulled so far into her face that only a small slit for her eyes remained. She had a blanket on her lap.

I stopped. Should I give her money? Normally I never do this. Homeless people just use it for alcohol anyways or they take it as a reason to continue being lazy. But after all, today is Christmas and Christmas stands for loving each other. Additionally, I already would have fulfilled my Christian duties for 2019.

"Merry Christmas", I said while giving her 2,-€.

"Tha..", she paused. Then she opened her eyes widely and stared at me in horror. I waited a few seconds for her to finish her sentence, but she didn't.

"Are you okay?"

Silence.

I put my hands on her shoulders and shook her. Even though I wore gloves I could feel that her body was icecold. Only now I saw that she was wearing a denim jacket. She didn't freeze to death, right? No. She just blinked. Besides that, she still needed to warm up. Maybe I should invite her for a coffee? Although, that would probably be weird.

"Do you want to have a cup of coffee? I'll pay. You seem very cold and I don't want you freezing to death."

She nodded and I helped her getting up. I had to support her while we went to the coffee shop,because her legs were shivering so much.

We barely were inside when the warm coffee smell greeted our noses. Determined I headed for the green tiled stove in the corner.

"I'm Elisabeth", I introduced myself while sitting down.

"Chloe", she answered sotto voce and looked at the floor.

"What's wrong?"

She stared at my face. "You..you look exactly like me"

As proof she uncovered her face. My jaw dropped...she was right! I rubbed my eyes and looked at her urgently.

Same blond hair. Same dark eyebrows. Same brown eyes. Same high cheek bones. Same pale skin.

"When and where were you born?", she asked me.

"November.20th.1995 in Vienna"

"Same"

We looked at each other knowingly. There was no doubt anymore. It was unnecessary to say it out loud. At least now I could explain the strange connection I felt towards her even though we just met. And that feeling that a part of me is missing, which I had felt for my whole life.

But how was this possible? Why didn't my parents tell me, that I have a twin sister? And why did they give her away? This made no sense, I had eight (!) younger siblings....my breath stopped and my eyes lit up for a second. What if they are not my real parents? I held my coffee cup tighter.

"Did you also grow up in an orphanage?", she asked.

"No...well...at least I think so."

"What's your surname?"

"Johnson", I answered.

She swallowed and her bottom lip was shaking. She quickly turned her head away from me.

"What?", I asked.

A big tear ran down her cheek and she wiped it away with her jacket sleeve.

"They hate me", she sobbed.

"Who hates you?"

"Our parents...I...I....visited them."

"When?"

"Well...as a teenager I lived with a foster family. However...my foster father always beat me up and I decided to run away. I took my guardians key for her filing cabinet and secretly sneaked into her office and searched for my file. In it I found our parents'address  and went there. I begged them to take me in. But they refused and told me that they never want to see me again."

What?! My parents would never act so evil! No matter what I got up to, they always loved me....however they kept my twin sister secret, should I really trust them?

I must get out of here. I stood up and ran outside. While standing on the sidewalk I looked up. Big snowflakes,glittering in the light of the streetlamps,fell onto me. I inhaled air into my lungs and felt how it gradually froze my blood.

Suddenly Chloe grabbed my shoulder. I roughly pushed her away and I started hurrying north. I pushed everyone who got in my way to the side. About the feelings of others I really didn't care right now.

Finally, I saw the house. I clenched my hands into fists and took a deep breath. I tore the door open and it slammed against the wall with a loud bang. I stepped in and these assholes were sitting on the couch and acted like nothing was wrong.

They turned towards me and looked at me confused. Then they saw the girl behind me. My father stood up and shouted towards Chloe: "Go away!You'll destroy everything! Nobody wants you here!"

I placed myself protectively in front of her and put my hands on my waist.

"What did you do?!", I said.

At first, I didn't get an answer. After a while my mother lowered her head and stammered: "I'm so sorry. We had no choice, otherwise we wouldn't have been able to keep you."

What is this bullshit supposed to mean?

"Mary shut up!"

"No, Robert, we really have to tell her. Please darling do never forget, that we always treated you good. We gave you everything you needed and we did pay your college fees."

"Mary, don't tell her!"

"I must. For years I have felt guilty! You don't know how it feels to wake up drenched in sweat EVERY NIGHT, because you dreamed again that Beth found out!"

"Tell me!", I hissed.

"Darling, we only did this to help you, you understand? You would have had a horrible life, if we didn't." She swallowed. "Twenty-two years ago, I was pregnant with another child, but I miscarried. I didn't tell anyone except your father. One day your father and I passed this homeless woman and we saw her sleeping with two newborns. We decided that it was the best to take them with us. I mean...what she could have offered you? She didn't even have a roof over her head. Afterwards we went to the hospital and told the stuff that you are mine. While signing the birth certificates I realised people believed that I was pregnant with one child. They would never believe me that I gave birth to healthy twins after so many miscarriages. So we chose to keep you and gave Chloe away, I'm sorry."

I stared at her speechlessly. My whole life was a lie. What should I do? Will I ever meet my birth mother? What about my siblings...were they also kidnapped by my parents or are they their biological children?