Somewhere For Words To Go

brains are weird.

i'm fucked up.
i love him.
wow.
i love him.
i have emotionally enabled the mental ability of having strong feelings towards this boy who i have known for three months and who has become my boy best friend. what really sends me into confusion though is the fact that my brain has made me act this way when i know that he has a girlfriend and will most likely never feel the same about me. and he will always think of me as a friend and nothing more. our brains can be interesting sometimes. they can conclude feelings towards other people and genders. it decide what hobbies you have and what hobbies you don't have. it can create fantasies in your head that aren't or haven't been realistic. which is why i get so mad at myself sometimes. my brain creates these images of him and i together at night when i am cold but he is warm and he cuddles me in an attempt to warm me up when he is currently just a best friend to me and i am a best friend to him and nothing romantic is happening between us in the moment. brains are weird. feelings are weird. life is weird. everything is weird. everybody is weird, whether they choose to except that or not. nobody is the same. nothing is the same. they may look and act similar but it is never the same. everything always changes. especially my attitude. that bitch changes all the time. wow.

12/9/2018
2:38am