Living the Lie

Into the Darkness

        It always starts the same: vacant stares, forced smiles, false happiness, a dull pain in your head that minute by minute pushes its way into your heart and your stomach and before you know it has you in its grasp. Everyone sees the smiles and hears the gentle laughter but getting caught up in the same old excuse telling everyone, "I'm just tired," no one realizes one thing; it's just a lie. 

        Depression is never truly expected. When you're brought to life from your mother's womb no one looks at the fragile baby they hold oh so tenderly as in fear of breaking you and says to your parents or other family or merely to themselves, "yep, this ones going to be depressed." Sometimes life does take unexpected turns and a lingering sadness is understandable like when one is bullied and pushed around or suffers some kind of abuse within the first few measly years of their life. But sometimes it invades you wholly completely unwarranted. To determine which is worse is out of our hands, but what can undeniably be determined is that depression is not fair.

        When someone becomes depressed it isn't because they "qualify" to be depressed. You don't have to be allowed or acceptable in the eyes of whatever deems depression onto it's beholder. We, and I say we as in the human race as a whole, mostly envision the homeless and poor and seemingly "needy" as the likely to be depressed. In a way, this is true. But once a step is taken back and the truth in a whole is looked on, the rich and famous, and those who rank highly on the social ladder are quite likely, as well, to behold this darkness known as depression.  

        The signs can be massive or barley even there; sometimes they're not even noticeable. Sometimes when people get depressed you can tell because they lose interest in things they once loved outwardly or sometimes they, as in meanings of the person them self, can be unrecognizable as their personality changes completely. But sometimes they seem normal, happy. And that moment, the moment when the world around you starts to crumple and you're always only merely "fine" is the moment you begin living the lie.