Trapped

Chapter 1

Have you ever felt like me, hated, not liked. When someone looks at you, you know it's bad. Just a week ago I ran away from home. Everyone at school knows now all thanks to my so called " bff" Max. I hate to admit it but everytime I call her my bff she goes and spills all of my secrets. It's not like she didn't have secrets. I know a lot of stuff that if her parents found out she would be dead. Well lucky for her, I don't talk to anyone, so her secrets won't get out anyway. If I did talk to real people I would just do the little secrets. If anyone knows the process of divorce it's me. My mom has been through it several times. I haven't really ever had an "Real" dad. My dad left when I wasn't even born yet.I wouldn't be like the big backstabbing friends. She's not to that stage but I feel like soon she will be just like them.

Walking down the hall with my earbuds in listening to depressing songs, I see Max standing by my locker. Even though I needed my books, I didn't go anywhere near her. I know that if I just go up to her and say "Hi bff." Then she'll think I'm just a psycho. I don't know what's gotten into her but she's a totally different person since we started 8th grade. Even though she comes to my locker everyday, I know she just wants to know my secrets so she can just go around and tell everyone. I know I should just go and get my books but it's not that easy, that would draw attention on me: I don't need that right now. I've seen the pills in the cabinet, hopefully I never use them. But who knows because everything I've been through I feel like I need to just go away.

Music is my getaway. I wonder what being famous feels like. I get so frustrated, why do your "bff"'s have to just stab you in the back. If I could go back to any year it was the year before my sister died. If I just knew how she died then I would get the answer to all my questions. If only she didn't die, then maybe I would have at least more real friends. I just wish that I could have the answers to everything. You can't study when someone is in trouble like you do for an test or quiz. The day that my sister died I was totally crushed: depression didn't hit me until a week later. If I knew that it would hit me later then I would've been prepared. I cut my wrists everyday until my brother found out; I knew he would tell mom. Once mom found out she said that the kitchen was off limits if I was by myself, I couldn't stay home by myself, and she also locked every weapon that we had in the house in the gun case that my biological dad sent my sister. But mom forgot to lock away the pills. I knew it was to dangerous so I knew that wasn't an option.  

~I will try and update this as much as possible as I am trying to balance school,sports,family, and writing. If you all like this than I will write more. Comment down below what book I should right next.~