The Adventures of Juliberto, the two dots V two dots

Part one: The life of Juliberto :v:

Once upon a time, there was a two dots v two dots who lived in the mountain. His only companions were the goatcows (half cow half goats that did a sound similar to "maAAAAH"), and he ate rocks and goat's cheese all day, since he didn't know how to eat anything else.
The goatcows bullied Juliberto because he didn't know how to make cheese and eat grass like them.

And there he was, eating goat cheese in his cave, looking at the beautyful nature of the mountain and the goatcows, a few meters underneath him.
He ate sadly, his sight lost in the horizon, with a black and white filter, sad music and a narrator narrating his sad life.
Like that, and with Juliberto crying little balls. It was a very dramatic situation.

A day like any other one, Juliberto was  eating his goat cheese from five o'clock when a stick bug landed on it. He got scared, threw his beloved cheese to the floor and backed up to the back of the cave because of how scared he was.

Since thar day, Juliberto decided to become vegan because of the trauma with the bug, which costed him two years of intensive therapy and an self help book. "I won't eat cheese never again", he decided.
But there was a problem: Juliberto didn't know shit about veganism. Literally anything. So he decided what looked the most obvious to him: eating grass.

Since that day, the goatcows accepted Juliberto like another one of  them, and started going out together to eat grass at the sunrise.

The end?

I don't think so.

You gotta know, young Padawan, that if between the grass you find a bug that smells like grass xdxdxd, you'll have a gipsy curse for the rest of your life; worse than any your simple mortal mind can think of.

Juliberto went out to eat some grass at  the sunrise like any other day, with  the beloved company of the goatcows.
"Why does it smell like grass xdxdxd?" Juliberto asked himself, not knowing that the answer was right in front of his eyes...

He then found the goatcows in a V formation, with the bug that smells like grass xdxdxd at the front, of them looking at him menacingly.
They were all searching for revenge, because since he didn't eat cheese anymore, he left the goatcows without a job, and since he now eats grass, he ate the bug that smells like grass xdxdxd's family.

He started smelling like grass xdxdxd because of the curse and everyone ran away from him, with evil laughs and trying to  not trip on rocks.
He asked the rocks why did he smell like grass xdxdxd, but obviously, the rocks can't speak. He asked the flowers, and they gave him pollen and bees, but they were useless and he ended up with some bee stings. Then, he went to ask to the cave's virgin.
The virgin threw a paper at him that said: "Juliberto need to search for the fountain of orange water".

Juliberto got out of his cave the next day to search for the fountain.
He walked  and walked for days, crossed desserts and oceans untill he arrived to the corner next to his cave and found a fountain that he thought was the orange water fountain, BUT NO!
It was salmon water, and since the dumb fuck failed the art class in primary school where they teached them the names of colors, he thought it was this one. When he realized it wasn't the fountain he was looking for, he went back to his cave, discouraged, dragging his feet and still smelling like grass xdxdxd.

It wasn't until 84 years later when Juliberto found the fountain.  "Its been 84 years", he said when he saw it.
Protecting the fountain, there were some lizards and he fought against them with the power of love, friendship and the smell of grass xdxdxd, since they didn't let him bathe.
He got into the fountain and magically, the smell of grass xdxdxd disappeared, but his skin became orange like a Cheeto.
He got to know the reason afterwards, when he read a wood sign that said: "Actually, the water is orange because of Cheeto dust".

Juliberto didn't know what Cheetos were, so he asked the sky "WHAT ARE CHEETOS", but the sky didn't reply.
He sat in a frog pose.
A few minutes later, a bag of Cheetos fell ln his head, courtesy of the sky.
"Holy Virgin, lets try 'em" Juliberto said.
He had a good time eating Cheetos.
When he arrived at his cave, he hid his Cheetl bag underneath his bed and the goatcow skins. His house acquired the distinct smell of Cheetos and the goatcows got into his cave because they loved the smell.

Then, the goatcows saw the bag and, since they hated Juliberto cause he left them with no job, they told him the truth: CHEETOS AREN'T VEGAN.
"Goddamn!" were Juliberto's last words before he died, since his body wasn't used to non vegan products.

But then, BOOM!
An explosion of shinny stuff and purpurin from the chinese bazar came out from his dead body and sent half the goatcows  to Kosovo, and from this explosion  Juliberto was born again. He was reborn from his ashes like a fenix and upgraded like a Transformer, prepared to fight against the goatcows and the bugs that smell like grass xdxdxd.
But that's another story.

THE END~

Special thanks:
I wanna say thanks to the green  bug that smells like grass xdxdxd for contributing to  inspire this story,
to the :v: for appearing unexpectedly why I was trying to make a packman and last but not least,

I wanna thank Nelson -Satan- Mandela for making all of this possible and not eating my left eye.