Love Takes Trust

10

Leona

I hated walking these halls. So crowded, so loud. Some people bump me as I walk, annoyed mumbles of "Watch where your going" as if they never bumped me. Or maybe it was my fault, my fault for walking with my head down.

I tug my jacket sleeve down a bit, holding my books tighter in case they fall from my hands. I pray my unsteady steps don't cause me to trip on my own feet.

I don't want to be here. I wanna go home, curl up into a ball and stay there. I want to cry for no reason at all, I don't feel like myself.

I feel a arm wrap around me. Rose was smiles at me, I wish I was Rose. She's pretty, nice body, happy, people actually like her well not really but it's better than not being liked at all.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

"Don't have any," I mumble.

She doesn't speak for a while. Like she's trying to figure out what to say.

"Hungry? I don't want the rest," She hands me a breakfast sandwich. I eye it for a while, I was hungry, my stomach wanted to say yes but my mouth told her no instead.

"You're a bad liar. Eat it, unless your allergic?"

I shake my head and took a bite of the sandwich, "Thank you."

"What are friends for," She giggles.

I cant be friends with someone like Rose. Rose was a model who had a life, I'm a sad girl with no life. She can't be seen with me.

"Did you have fun at the beach? I saw Santiago was teaching you how to swim."

I shake my head.

"You didn't? Why not?"

"I'm afraid of water."

"Oh. I'm afraid of dogs, they're cute but I'm so scared it'll bite me. Everyone's afraid of something."

I don't respond to her. She looks down at the time, cursing to herself, "Fuck I forgot I had to do something before class. You good if I leave?"

"Go ahead."

She hugs me briefly then running off to do what ever she had to do. Leaving me all alone. I love being alone, no one questions me but at the same time I hate it.

Suddenly a hand grabs me and pulls me away. I take a look at who's pulling me, fear washes over me. Those tears I wanted to cry out are now here. I try pulling away but I end up tripping instead.

He pulls me into a empty corner of the school. He looks angry. It always scared me when he was angry.

"I miss you." He states, trying to force himself to smile. Instead of a smile that makes me feel at ease it makes him look more terrifying.

He walks closer and pulls me into a hug. The sudden action makes me flinch. "Please take me back, Bellezza." The sound of my name sounds disgusting, mispronounced, misused. No one was supposed to call me Bellezza.

My name is Leona not Bellezza. Bellezza was the Cuban-Italian who lived in Rome, Italy and was bullied. Leona is the Cuban-Italian who lives in America now but her life is just as worse as before.

"You don't have to be afraid of me. I'm gonna hit you. I hate myself for doing that to you. I promise I won't ever touch you."

lies.

you broke that promise before.

you're touching me.

please stop touching me.

Ryan pulls back and looks at me. He wipes a tear from my cheek but the action only makes me cry more. Then his lips are on mine, his hands squeezing my arms tight it feels like they'll bruise. I kick him between his legs as he moves away from me in pain I take the chance to run away.

It wasn't the first time I ran from him. I knew he'd find me eventually. He always did. He'd hit me till he got tired, then apologized and promised never to do it again.

"Hey!" A voice yells, I bumped into Santiago. He tries to stop me by holding onto me but I push him away, collapsing onto the floor. I pull my knees up to my chest as I try to hide the fact that I was crying. It wasn't any help. He had already saw me.

He places a hand on my arm, right where Ryan's hands were. I flinch away causing him to quickly move his hand off me.

"Sorry," He whispers, "Leona, can I touch you? If you say no I won't."

I shake my head.

"Ok I won't. Do you wanna talk?"

I shake my head.

"If I got someone else will you talk to them?"

I nod.

"Who?"

"Alex."

"Okay."

Santiago moves to sit down next to me but leaves enough room for me to have my own comfortable space.

Maybe Santiago isn't as bad as I originally thought.

Alex comes after a few minutes, running down the halls. I guess he texted her since I never heard him speak. She freezes in front of me not sure what to do. I pull her into a hug, a silent permission for her to be allowed to hug me.

Alex was the only person I told about Ryan. She can keep secrets even though she didn't want to. She wanted me to tell the cops but Ryan's family is rich and trustworthy enough that they could buy Ryan's way out of getting arrested. Make lies that their son would never do such a thing. Rich people can be deceiving. Maybe not all of them but Ryan's parents especially are.

"He-"

I nod, squeezing her tighter.

"Are you hurt?"

I shake my head.

"Santiago, mind skipping? I mean you don't have to," Alex muttered to Santiago. I almost forgot he was here.

"Yea, I can drive-"

"No, can we walk? If that's fine with you?"

Santiago doesn't say anything. I'm not even sure if he gave her response because I can't see him from where me and Alex are.

Alex helps me and wipes the tears from my eyes. Santiago grabs my things and holds them which I'm assuming means he's coming with us.

"You should probably text the others and tell them we won't be here." Alex tells Santiago.

"It's ok Leona. I'm not gonna let him hurt you." Alex whispers so Santiago can't hear knowing I don't want him to hear as she pulls me into a hug.

Alex is the only person I trust.