Patient 103

July 7th

(i meant to publish this months ago woops)
FOUL LANGUAGE AND POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNING AHEAD IN STORY
Hey Diary, this is my first entry to a diary since my counselor recommended i keep a journal. Anyway, time to get to the sad stuff.

It is July 7th 2021, and my name is Layla i am a seventeen year old female. My mother died when i was 14 and today marks 3 years of her being dead. She commited suicide after my step dad had abused her since i was born, now he abuses me. I am not very liked in school i have a bad reputation. I am aggressive and always pick fights because i dont know how to cope properly, little do the people at school know i am not so tough. I have scars covering my arms and i cry myself to sleep every night. Some people might say they would "die" to be me because the act i put up is ideal to them, which it shouldn't b-.

I close my journal when i hear the front door burst open. "LAYLA WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU" i can just sense the smell of vodka on his breath. I have always wanted to fight back his abusive ways but i just cant over power him. If my two brothers still lived here they could try and protect me but they moved out before my mom died and they thought he stopped being abusive. I get out of my thoughts when i see my step dad walk in my room, cigarette in his hand.

"Why the FUCK didn't you answer me when i called for you. You didnt even make me a fucking meal."
He stepped closer and closer till i could smell his teeth rotting.
"I - I'm sorry" i stammered.

"Oh you're going to be sorry"

after he said that he took his lit cigarette and put it right to my face, burning it while i start to cry in pain. The more i resist the worse it gets so i just have to take it i guess.

"You've been drinking."
he stands back smiling at what hes done to my already beaten face.
"Go make me some damn food you fucking slut
slut"
I go to our kitchen and make him some pasta and chicken with a glass of vodka and coke mixed. I slipped in a couple crushed sleeping pills too so i could go out later without him noticing right away. After i set his stuff down on the table in front of him i had to go baby sit.
"I have to go to work, ill be back in a few hours"

"Okay slut dont come back with a boy you remember what happened before" he laughed evily. Last time i brought over my gay best friend Joey i got a beating and i couldnt walk for 2 weeks even after i told him he was my gay friend and i never did shit with him. Joey is the only person in school that knows what goes on at home. I've always wanted to tell my brothers whats been happening but my stepdad said if i brought it up to any one and the cops got involved he would end up killing either me or the people i actually give a shit about.

A couple hours later

The house im baby sitting at today is huge and im only baby sitting one 4 year old. It was 8 p.m and her mom and dad should be home soon so i was just in the living room watching tv snacking on a bag of chips i took from their pantry. I would do so much to live here with this money and two loving parents. I have baby sat this little girl quite a few times before and ive grown attached to her adorableness. As the last episode of The Vampire Diaries finished on Netflix, the little girls parents arrived. I got up to go greet them.
"Gracie is in her bed asleep shes been there for about an hour, she said she started feeling sick a while ago but didnt throw up."

"Thank you so much Layla i hope you have a great night" Mrs. Jacobs told me. She has become like the mom i havent had in a long time, my mom died three years ago and that was when i first baby sat Gracie.