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Corbyn POV

You would always show up late
A deck of excuses in your hands.....

"Hey sorry that I had some thing to do at work and they held me up..... Hey sorry my mom called and I didn't look at the time....hello yeah I stayed up too late last night and I didn't mean to! But happy birthday Corbyn!!" That was what he always said. He had a reason for everything big in my life! I was tired of waiting on him all the time.

It has been 7 years since he first asked me to be his boyfriend and I felt the love was real. But it started to fall apart and he missed my birthday 4 years in a row. One of them he didn't even say happy birthday. I was starting to have doubts.

I would be the first to claim I didn't mind
I understand......

I would act not bothered when he would come home and be off and everyone was bothered and would ask me if I cared. I did, but he had a life so I compromised with every excuse that came out of his beautiful lips.

4 years ago...

"Hey babe I missed you! I wanna spend every single day with you! I love you with my entire heart!" Zach facetimes me and when he hung up I end up bawling since he didn't even come home that night and it was the next afternoon when I saw him next.

"I had some thing come up at work I couldn't come that night."
And I fell for the stupidest lie of them all and Daniel told me  to leave him, but I didn't  listen to him. And now he is dead because of me.

Dear Corbyn,
I can't stay in your life anymore.... I tried to help you but you never listened. I wanted you to be happy. I knew you more than he did in those 7 years and I only knew you for 3 of them! I didn't know why you never saw the way I looked out for you, the way I treated you like a prince when I didn't have much.....Why couldn't you see that I loved you? that you hurting caused me to hurt. Well then if you can't see that them so be it.

Love your friend,
Daniel J. Seavey

They found him hanging from his balcony and I never got over seeing his pale lifeless face knowing that he would not even smile or laugh again. When it came to his funeral, Zach gave an excuse for that too.

"Hey I am sorry my mom called me before I got here and I forgot to look at the time.

But hey, I get it family is more important.

I went home and cried to myself and he didn't even come over and saved me for killing my own self. It was Jonah who saved me actually. He held me close.

I put all my songs into a tape
All my words you held inside your hand.....

I gave Zach a recording of love songs that were my favorite as a gift for his one birthday.

And I don't think you ever even listened to them once
I understand.....

I gave it to him and I was so upset to see them back in their boxes and they were even wrapped the fuck back up. I was so torn at all of this.

"What did did I do to deserve this pain?"