Finding That Reason

Finding That Reason:To stay in a world you don't understand

I've never been very popular.I don't understand it,I've tried reading manga,tried to at least enjoy raw fish(I really hate raw fish),tried watching anime,I tried to understand the japanese culture as much as possible.Tried to be as "Japanese" as possible,but no matter what I did I never really did fit in,whether it was because I grew up in France or the fact that I really like cheese or because my hair literally has sequences in it,I don't really know.I'm not very good at putting myself down,it doesn't come naturally,so when the aspect that someone doesn't like me,I don't see how someone could not like this.

I'm at least half Japanese though,my mum's japanese so I'm ok at speaking the language,scratch that I'm forgetful of the language,Japanese is so different to French,and everyone even Mum used to speak to me in French,and then one day I wake up and I'm in a car and I can't move,And I think I've been sedated,and paralysed,and I'm thinking "I wonder if they put something in my drink or shot me with a dart while I was asleep.and as I'm regaining my ability to move and I've got one foot sticking out he open window and I'm about to jump out

I realised that Mum was driving the car and she explained that I wouldn't wake up so she got Nounou (my French Grandma)to put me in a trolly she found i 

n the garage and dump me in the car,and that we were going to Japan,and I was to learn everything about the Japanese culture besides the "repulsive" anime and manga.

I didn't believe her though, I thought that maybe that the person driving the car was not my mum but an imposter so I asked her a very personal question "why is one of my testicles smaller than the other?"I knew if she knew the answer to that question she was my Mum "because you fell from your window when you were 10 you tried to jump out and onto one of the tree branch of the big coolabah tree you misjudged the distance between your window sill and the branch and fell,you landed awkwardly and we had to call the ambulance which took 8 hours to arrive,the paramedic we talked to on the phone thought we were prank calling them, couldn't blame them really,we sounded like idiots going on about how you had busted a nut,we had to call them three times before they finally came and got you,you had to have surgery and that's why you've got one small testicle,your dad treated it like nemo's dad had treated nemo's smaller fin,it was yours and your dads special little nut" she had answered,she was definitely my mother.

so I learnt japanese so I could go to school,socialise,read,eventually get pulled over by cops for speeding or something illegal and be able to act dumb and as If I didn't know Japanese and run off without going to jail,also to avoid getting murdered in my sleep by Grandma.

Grandma is a very traditionally Japanese old lady,and she didn't know that I was half French and that I didn't have the slightest idea of Japanese culture,so I had to learn every emperor and ruler of Japan in its history and what they did and what was happening during that era,and I had to learn how to speak Japanese in little less than a month.I had to change a lot for may grandma I even had to change my last name to Aoyama(my Mum's last name)

When I first met Grandma last year the first thing she said to Mum was,and I quote "who's this kid"she had nodded at me "you find him on the street?" And Mum had shuffled her feet and answered "he's my son,and your grandson" and Grandma(the old hag) had scrunched up her face in disgust and... "my grandson isn't a gay stripper" and by this point I'm yelling at "grandma" in French,yelling really rude words that I'm glad she didn't know the meaning of,really rude words in not only French,I'm yearling every rude word I could think of from the 22 languages I knew besides Japanese.

Later on Mum had not been happy with me,apparently I had "disrespected" my elders and was a "disgrace" to my family

Well the old hag disrespected me first,and she was the one that's a disgrace,a disgrace to the human race that is