Love is an odd thing.
It's odd in a way that not everyone sees it the same way. It can be seen and felt in so many different ways but it's never the same. Some people claim that it doesn't exist, whereas others believe it does. I personally think that our minds are very powerful, but I'm not sure if I believe in love.
As a child I believed in love. I claimed that I was in love with John, my very first boyfriend. I thought that he was the one.
My one true love.
I remember how foolish I was back then, but to be fair, I was young and John was the first boy that ever payed attention to me. We met when I was 14 and he was 15. He had blond hair and crystal blue eyes that could make you melt when you stared at them for too long. When he spoke to me I felt like I was a completely different person. He made me feel more alive.
I was 14, I didn't know what that feeling was. All I knew was that I wanted to be wherever he was. I wanted him to hold me closer when we hugged even though it would've been impossible. I wanted him to kiss me every single day.
At the age of 18, we were known as the couple that's ''most likely never going to break up''. I thought that our love was solid as a rock. As sweet as ice cream on a hot summer day. When we were together, everything seemed possible. When I had an interview for a job, he would always reassure me that I was going to be okay. That they would want to hire me. When I got let off from work due to budget cuts, he comforted me and told me that they just lost their best worker.
He always seemed to know what to say to me.
Little did I know, he had been cheating on me.
I had gotten out of school early one day and decided to swing by his apartment. Only to my surprise he wasn't alone. I walked in on him and my, then best friend, Alicia having sex on the couch. I was shocked. He was cheating on me with my best friend. The girl who knew that I loved John with all my heart. That day, I had lost complete trust in both of them.
I was sure to have trust issues with my future boyfriends because of this.
After catching them, I cried for weeks. I blamed myself for his cheating on me. I didn't think I was pretty enough and that maybe that's why he cheated on me. I couldn't help but blame myself for it.
Luckily, I had amazing friends that helped me through it. They spent all their extra time with me, helping me through this breakup, and I'm glad I had such amazing friends.
That all happened 2 years ago.
Now I'm in University studying science and hopefully getting my major in stellar astronomy in a couple of years.
The reason why the thought of love crossed my mind is because of my friend Max.
Earlier on today, Max and I had been talking about the court case that she's been studying for her Law class. The case was about a guy that killed his wife, in ''the name of love''. The reason why he killed his wife is because she cheated on him, so to make sure she wouldn't do it again, he killed her. Max explained how some people do crazy, stupid things in the name of love, and apparently that was one of them. Some people can be irrational and some can be forgiving when it comes to love.
Which is why that made me think of John. Was I too irrational, by breaking up with him? What if I had been forgiving, maybe we would still be happy together.
