2 truths and 1 lie

2 truths and a lie

There have been too huge traces of you in my life and when they seem to be just about to disappear, I ask for you in my prayers.

First I thought lovers were insane, then I thought they were cowards but then I realized I was just one of them, those whom the world misunderstood as crazies or failed to understand.

My love for you feels like the scar on Harry Potter's forehead, it's a noticeable thing, it's even a defining thing and yet here I am trying to hide it, as you can guess that can get really tiring ; hiding a part of your identity, keeping a noticeable thing in secret.

"what do you need?" I utter in an irritated tone for pushing you is the only way I know to deal with the situation until I figure out everything going on with me. And yet you pull me, everytime I push you away, everytime I go further, you take steps towards me and they cause me to stop in my tracks, to become still, your voice sounds a lot like a call back to home, it doesn't matter if I am tired or confused, you just always have space for me, there's always room and there's always time and I am forever afraid you'll run out of them eventually oneday when better tenants come 'coz frankly I feel like I don't even pay.

"does it hurt?" you ask and I'm tempted to answer in positive until I realize you'll ask me next what you can do to make me feel better and then there's just nothing you can do.This wound doesn't hurt, there are words unsaid, dreams unfulfilled and regrets that don't make sense, they do the job good enough.And I know all full well that your question had been regarding the wound.You only know the surface dear and I'm afraid you'll run away if I allowed you to dive deeper in me, the good in me and the bad in me, even if you're ready to take it all. Do I want to bother you, scare you with all my silly problems, should I do it?

"you did well." and just like that with a single, simple phrase you take my heart away but you make my day better so I can't really complain about getting breathless and of my irregular heartbeats you know.Do you know? are they loud enough? will you know if they stopped?

"I'm sorry" there goes the words that once my past self dreaded to hear and yet it felt oddly satisfying.I don't know if it's because they're coming from you or if I wanted a closure that bad, maybe even more than I wanted you, I do have to admit I always disliked unfinished things even if somewhere along life I became the one to leave things hanging and depart silently from certain places of life.Yet I believe some people are too precious to be left without explanation, ironically specially those who come over to live in your heart unannounced.Proper goodbyes; I'm a fan of them but not everyone gets one or one from the one they wanted.

There you lay so silent,motionless.I have never loved liars but I'll make an exception for you.After all your love for me was your last declaration to the world before you left it, closed your eyes to never open them again.You know I've told you countless times you have a bad habit of saving things for too long, until it becomes too late.

Time is precious,words are too and so is growth but it never comes as fast as the other two.

"Do I look good?"

"yes"

"Do you like me?"

"yes."

"Do you love me....more than a friend? my lips uttered shakily

"I'm sorry, I don't."

I have always believed the first one to be a lie but I was wrong as always; it was the last one.

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(a/n) I don't know what this is.This is very vague and not really related to anything.