Painful Good-Byes

We sat in the cab shoulder to shoulder, not speaking a word. Outside, snow was dancing through the snow and filling the dark streets withspots of white.

The driver turned the radio on to make up for the lack of noise in the car.Christmas songs hummed quietly and made me feel even heavier hearted.

I sneak a glance at you. You are leaning on the cab door with afrustrated, yet calm look on your face with your eyes fixated on the snow scene outside. You looked so hurt; I shouldn't have begged to come with you. I'm just making this more difficult...for the both of us.

The cab driver parked the car in the terminal and got out. He popped the trunk as you and I open the car doors and step out. As I clutch my purse handle with my cold bare hands I watch as the driver pulls your luggage out and hands it to you.

"Have a safe trip, sir," He says with a smile and then tipping his hat for me.

We thank him with fake voices and watch him drive away. Once he was gone we walked into the airport silently. After checking your baggage in we head to the boarding area.

You and I stood in front of each other, face to face not speaking a single word toeach other because we both didn't want it to be over.

I was trying very hard not to cry. Not in front of you. I quietly pull out the grey scarf I had gotten a week before. Walking closer to you, I begin to wrap itcarefully around your neck.

I force a smile on myface, “Here’s my last Christmas gift to you. I heard it isn't as cold where you'll be going, but I guess you could keep it to remember me by?"

I look up at you and stare directly into your dark eyes. You still looked frustrated. I let go of the scarf and backed away from you.

You clear your throat and begin to dig in your jacket for something. You hand me something red andsay, “You always forget to wear mittens so..."

I accept the red lump to find out they're a pair of mittens. I smile and try to blink the tears welling up in my eyes.

My throat began to get tight as I choked out, "T-thank you...for everything you've done for me..."

You asked, "So, I guess...This is good bye?"

I nod and look at you and notice you're ready to cry too. I try to smile again although it hurt, "Yes...Take care of yourself, okay?"

You blink away the tears and kiss megently on theforehead, "I will...Good bye..."

"Bye..," I whispered.

The two of us then turn around and hear our own ways. Every step away from you was so painful, I had to keep going. I had to move on. I kept a bold front until I got outside. Once outside my knees collapsed from beneath me and I crumpled to the ground in tears.

It...It was over.