My Attempt at Poetry

Beyond the Grave

I sat in a room with death for hours waiting to see who would speak first

We brushed against each other, but never quite touched

We played games with each other

But not the innocent games of uno or memory that I could remember from years ago

We played mind games

More on him part, but I tried to play my fair share

Spoiler alert: it is impossible

You can't be fair with death

You can only try

But even when you try your hardest it still is not enough

Though, I was used to that feeling, so it didn't bother me much

At times, I actually thought that I might be winning

But then i realized that was another one of his games

His games that still haunt me to this day

His games that made me want to scream and cry

His games that made me want to crawl into his warm embrace

But that would mean he won

And I hate losing

So I went on

I could see and hear people reach out to me at times

And that gave me some hope

But he was quick to cover my eyes and ears

Though, it's probably my fault for not trying to push him away

I had awaited this moment for years

That he would become more than just a thought

But he never gave me the satisfaction of taking me in

He became my best friend

Yet was also my worst enemy

Or so that's what I have been taught

They told me he was evil and ugly

The worst thing I could ever see

But he was more beautiful than the Angel Falls in Venezuela

He was more beautiful than natsukashii

He was more beautiful than vellichor

More lovely than petrichor and limerence

His presence was ineffable

In fact, I had been craving his presence for so long that

When I saw him, I didn't know how to react.

Do I cry?

And if so, out of fear and despair? Or bliss and felicity?

Do I scream and run?

Or do I stay silent and wait for the first mach to be lit?

The match that would produce a light

A light that would eventually become ethereal

The plants in the room seemed to die faster than usual

Perhaps that was his way of telling me he would grant my wished soon

But maybe that was one of his games

One of his games that tortured me

For hours

Days

Weeks

Years

I don't know how much time it was that we spent time together

That we were in the presence of each other

But I also am not very sure

That that time us up.