Diary of the Anonymous

Crowded hallways are the loneliest place--

No. Crowded hallways are not the loneliest places, at least not for me.

In fact, I find it comforting.

The buzz of the students. The bags and shoulders bumping me. The disturbing couples by their lockers. The noisy intercom announcing shit no one cares about.

It's nice. Why it's nice, I have no idea.

for outcast and rebels--

Well, I'm no outcast. I'm not a rebel either. And no, I didn't dare to be different. I don't know what I am. I'm 17 years old, am I supposed to know what I am?

I'm not one of the popular kids, I'm not unpopular either. I don't know where I'd classify myself in the food chain of what we call "high school".

Ew. Sorry, I just saw one of the Senior jocks "indiscreetly" rub his crotch as if no one's watching.

And you've been trying for so long..to find out where your place is..

No. I didn't try for so long, nope. I didn't even try. At all. I don't know where my place is. Like I said, I'm still 17, can't I figure that out when I'm done with my homework? Since, you know, education is the key to success so...yeah, do just that.

But in their narrow minds..

True. Most people do have a narrow mind. I, being one of them. I won't deny that. Yes, I guess that makes me a hypocrite, who isn't?

There's no room for anyone who dares to do something different..

True again, that's what it does with having a narrow mind. I mean, if all of a sudden, this one used-to-be fat kid joins a talent show for his or her amazing soprano voice, I'll be one of the students who used to tease or make fun of him...even if he joins the damn America's Got Talent or whatever out there.

Oh but listen for a minute..

Why? What for?

I won't take back what I said, I mean that's me, that's who I am. But still, I won't say my thoughts out loud. Either I'll be the initiator of bullying or I'll be bullied, either way, no one wins.

Trust the one..who's been where you are wising all it was..was sticks and stones.

Okay, who are you really trying to point out? I may not seem the best person in the world, nor the smartest, or even the kindest person, I do know that there isn't someone. I can't trust 'the one'. Why can't I trust him, you say? He or She is still in where I am, still wishing it was sticks and stones.

Those words cut deep but they don't mean you're all alone..and you're not invisible.

Damn right! Those words do cut deep like a knife slicing ice cream. I know I'm not alone, even though my parents are divorced and sometimes I don't know which place where I'll sleep for the night. They all want my attention. I don't know for what.

I am not alone. All these kids in the hallway, they're just like me. It's comforting, I'm not the only one suffering. I'm not invisible, I mean they are hitting me with their bags and shoulders yet I managed to say,

"Watch where you're going!" I sound tough. They look back and glare at me, and you know, I glare back. Bitch.

I once 'heard' that Noah Reese, the cliche "popular" guy in my school and at the top of the food chain, was beaten up by his alcoholic father until he moved out when he was 18 and stayed at his aunt's house.

Ashley Benson, the counterpart of Noah Reese, used to be bullied at her previous school for being too rich yet was a dumb bitch, hired a tutor. Apparently, she has a learning disorder that slows down her mind when processing information.

Then there was Shannon Lopez, a lesbian. Need I say more? She was a lesbian, who fell in love with our Math teacher, Mrs. Dianne Riggs, who is 16 years older than her.

Brian Ackles, a gay. He waas forced to quit the football team after allegedly, perving on the other players.

The depressed Marcus Johnson, the "bad boy" of the school, was juvenile delinquent, release last month after commiting arson. He burned down the house of his uncle at the age of 14.

Jenny Michaels, self proclaimed school 'slut'. Pregnant at 13, miscarriage at 13. Pregnant again at 16. Gave birth to a boy and named him after the father who impregnated her, Eric Atkins.

Naoki Matsunaga, suffers racism and bullying, does most of the class' homework and secretly dating Ashley Benson.

Eric Atkins, fathered a child, Jenny Michaels' long term boyfriend since sixth grade, smartest kid in class yet wasn't teased as a nerd or geek.

Nerd Katy Gray, overweight, suffers from slow metabolism and diagnosed as suicidal and anorexic. Victim of bullying.

Lucas Porter, 2 years drug addict. School bully, stereotyped black dude. Suffers cleptomania.

Sexually abused, Archer Clinton. 21 years old, still stuck in high school because his girlfriend died when he tried to defend himself when his mom tried to touch him again.

Secretly an erotica writer under the name Dry_Rubbits, Loisa Peters, asexual, bullied after her book got published because she is a "shitty writer who doesn't even know what sex is about."

Grant Morgan, Student Council President, cheated his own election victory by putting his name in all balot boxes.

The bully, Presley "Porkchop" Preston, beats up kids so he can get their lunch money because he doesn't have one. His mother is an alcoholic drug user, and his father died while in the military.

Who else am I missing?

Hear me out, there's so much more to life than what you're feeling now.

I almost forgot about the song I'm listening to. I know there is more to life than right now. Hell, I don't even know what my point is.

Someday you'll look back on all these days

I wonder when that'll be.

And all this pain is gonna be invisible.

What do you mean by invisible exactly?

All I know, all these names I mentioned contributted to what I am now. Frankly speaking, I don't like what they made me become

I like this song.