Writing
I don’t know if we are allowed to write about writing. It is something I always wanted to do. For me writing is a form of expression, expression of things which cannot be said in person. Being an anxious and socially awkward person, meeting someone and talking to them is dreadful. I spend hours forming sentences and paragraphs in my mind and not expressing them just kills me. People don’t get how words can be influencing. How they can affect you, how they are so mandatory in interactions? Using a ton of emoticons just doesn’t do justice to the beauty of words. People text inattentively but I like to analyse every fucking word, letter & dot of it. I know its lame to put so much effort in such meaningless thing.
I have always felt that word move people rather it be any form. For me lyrical form is the best. Combine anything with good music and there you got yourself a masterpiece. My love for music so overpowering, be it any language I dig it. My choice in music very biased, I mean I need good lyrics it is a must for me. I take my time like a really long time and understand idea, thoughts and emotions behind it. It makes me so much happy. Oh! Music with overflowing emotions is my guilty pleasure. It keeps me up at night and makes my life so much harder.
I don’t know if you have felt that. It’s like every part of your body denies to move and you get a lump in your throat that does not go away and your chest hurts so bad that your eyes starts welling up but you are not able to cry because u don’t know what you are feeling and you don’t know what to do with this sudden surge of emotions. Your whole day becomes gloomy but happy gloomy. I mean I blush when I play that tone in my mind as I have found my new love. I love when it aches every time I listen to it like falling in love and that ache becomes so addictive that I have to listen it all the time like being in love. Yeah too much love!
Coming back to topic…
I have always thought writing is cumbersome but you hold a pen and start writing, it becomes so effortless. Then again how could writing worn u out when we do it to feel light?
I am not very drawn by the process of if it but I adore the idea behind it. It’s always fascinating to tell people your story and being able to not forget them ever especially those that meant something to you. It’s like collecting every fucking thing that you loved on a piece of paper, I know so very convenient. I still remember the first time I wrote a poem, I was so overwhelmed with emotions I just took a paper and penned it down and in minutes I was holding it with so much pride. It was then that I realized the simplicity of it. I still cannot do it all the time even when I feel like writing I just pass that moment gossiping, sleeping and crying. Maybe it was simple once but not anymore.
I wonder so much how authors write without having fear of being judged. How they can be honest with their work knowing that other’s going to have strong opinion about them. Or they just modify their stories. Did Anne Frank know that her diary is going to be published one day and people are really going to relate to it? What made her diary so intriguing even she wasn’t travelling, meeting new people or I don’t know kissing strangers? Her life was a struggle but still it was monotonous and she managed to lure us into it. I still think it was the desperation of expression that and the expression itself that did the wonder. I have read somewhere, “A true thing poorly expressed is a lie.” Therefore it is so important to me.
