the problem with mortality

just so you know

I always wondered what would happen if I were to die. Not in like a kill-myself sort of way, though. I just wondered what would happen. Both to me and to everyone else. I wanted to know what sort of impact I'd made and the only real way of knowing that is to die. I believed that then and I most definitely believe it now. But I'm getting ahead of myself. 

Everyone dies, obviously. Some people die when they are old and wrinkly and others when they're young and had "so much more life left to live" or whatever. I never believed any of that shit though. When the kid from the high school two towns over ran into a tree last year because he was drunk as fuck, I didn't think about all the things he could've done with his life. I thought about the things he did do with his life. He spent his days vaping in bathrooms and fucking girls from here to Timbuktu. So I don't think he had more life to live, I think he would have lived that same life for two years and then gone to jail. Or overdosed. 

Anyway, my point is that everyone dies. So I was not shocked when I was hit by the drunk driver outside of my high school. I was surprised, however, when I woke up to see my body flatlining in a hospital bed and my mother crying beside it.