"SKY SAYS YOU'RE A TWAT FOR NOT SAYING HI!!" XavierTyson shouted from her room.
"WHATEVER." Arevoir shouted back. He was annoyed. He trudged downstairs to the kitchen and opened the fridge. All he could see was ice-cream sandwiches, fizzy drinks and Xavier's left-overs. He sighed. They never had anything nice and plain to eat. He turned round and walked to the dining table. That's when he saw her, lying perfectly on the table. He stopped and stared. He could not believe how amazing she looked. Plain and simple- just how he liked her. He heard her calling.
"Pasta boy... Pasta boyyyy...." His heart warmed at the sound of her voice.
(But who am I kidding, it's Arevoir... He's totally French... Let's try that again.)
His heart stayed exactly the same metaphorical temperature at the sound of her voice.
(That's better.)
"I- I never knew you could look so pretty..." He stuttered, still in awe at how beautiful she looked. She was steaming hot, curled on top of the family dining table. He walked over to the chair nearest her and sat down.
"Let's keep it our little secret." She teased. He could hear the wink in her voice. He picked up his fork, his eyes never leaving her. He brushed the salt and pepper away. He never used seasonings. He stuck his fork into the mass of pasta and smiled, putting a big forkfull into his mouth.
"Oh, that feels SO GOOD!" She said.
"You taste... Amazing..." He replied. He chewed and swallowed quickly, not wanting to waste a second.
"I'M GETTING SOME MORE ICE-CREAM SANDWICHES, BE BACK SOON" XavierTyson shouted down as she grabbed the house keys and ran out the door. Arevoir smiled. He was alone with her, the pasta, now. He shoved his fork back into the nest of plain spaghetti and twirled. She was always his favourite. His eyes narrowed as he saw the salt and pepper creep closer. He pushed them off the table. He still didn't need them. He raised his fork to his mouth and whispered:
"I will always love you..." He looked down at the forkfull of pasta and smiled. He knew she would too.
He swallowed the second forkfull of pasta and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He picked up even more of her, and shovelled her into his mouth. With the last mouthfull of pasta, he heard her.
"Th-that felt amazing... Please.. Come back more often..." He smiled and carried his plate to the dishwasher.
"Oh I will..." He said.
He walked back upstairs to his computer and continued recovering from Sky_Lady_2000.
"That was rude >:L" She said. He laughed.
"I don't like campers >:L" He retorted. She just sat in her spawn, fuming with rage. She was only going to be there for a few more seconds, she murmered.
He turned around to see Xavier with a large pack of ice-cream sandwiches and smiled nervously.
"I- thanks" She looked confused.
"Why are you so.. Weird?" She laughed. "I mean weirder than normal.."
"I-I don't know..." She frowned and walked out the room, back to her computer.
He turned and slowly put one of the three ice-cream sandwiches into his mouth. He thought back to what was in the fridge and wondered why Xavier had to go and get more of what filled the shelves. He took a bite, and heard the door open. XavierTyson walked in and smiled, turning her head to one side. Arevoir dropped the ice-cream sandwich and collapsed onto the floor.
He woke up the next day surrounded by pasta with chilli, cheese and yoghurt. He screamed.
