nightmares

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I've been having nightmares.
Every morning, I wake up from my own tears.
Yet somehow still, my worst nightmares are during the day.
My chest, heavy with the terrifying weight of living
skin crawling with the horrific feeling of never being happy
heart pounding at the thought of never being loved
mind racing at the realization that I am alone
legs shaking at the thought of going on
and paralyzed, by the sight of the bill from my psychiatrist.
I've been waiting so long to wake up.

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