It's cold outside, and I'm walking in the rain rushing to get home. It's 3 in the morning. I need to push myself harder in training. I need to train hard enough so that if something happens again I'll be able to protect them.
My whole world is fucked up. My brothers been in jail for the past 5 years and he has 8 more to go. He left me here all alone to deal with everything and everyones bullshit. My parents don't even care about me, even though I'm the youngest they pay more attention to my older sister and my older brother.
I could of done better to protect her, I've been feeling pain ever since the day I lost her. I should of done something to protect her better, I should of gotten there sooner. I should of ran out the car fast enough so that I could of jumped in front of that bullet. She's gone because of me. I'm the reason she's dead. I shouldn't have left her alone.
These are the thoughts that been going through my mind ever since that night. I finally reach the house and I climb up the window, into my room. I only have three hours of sleep before the first day of school.
I slowly drift into sleep, while the sky is still crying.
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I get up as soon as I heard the heavy footsteps that belong to my father, I run into the bathroom before my dad opens the door.
I turn the shower on and begin cleaning my face and body. After that I put on her favorite hoodie, some high waisted black jeans with rips, and vans.
I don't even bother eating breakfast, I jump into my brothers Dodge Challenger Hellcat and make my way to school.
I stop by the gasoline station that's not that far from school. As I'm putting the gas into my car, I recognize something. Alondra's short black hair, she turns around and sees me and her smiles fades away. She probably hates me. She probably blames me for her death I don't blame her I blame me too . I look closely into her eyes and notice something in her eyes I didn't expect to see from her. Sadness.
I expect anger, I expect her to be glaring at me not for her to feel sad for me. She should hate me. She should blame me. I break eye contact and get in the car.
As I'm making my way to the cemetery I wonder if Alondra has ever come to visit her. I take a deep breath before I step out of the car. I walk toward her grave and I feel my heartbeat beating faster as I get closer.
" Hey desteny, it's the first day of school, today starts our junior day in high school. You should be here." My voice starts breaking and I stop talking because I know I can't trust my voice right now.
" I miss you. I miss you so much. I miss your laugh. I miss the way you got mad and acted more of a mom to me than my mom ever did. I wish you were here. I'll come back tomorrow okay?" I get up and walk toward my car. Anger rushes through my veins as I see the car that's been following me for the past three weeks. I tried going up to knock on the window but they sped away before I get the chance too.
I punch the tree as I hard as I can, to let my anger out.
I get in the car and sped to school.
As usual I'm late. I don't even bother coming early to school anymore there's no purpose. I come to school to kill time. My inspiration to come to school is gone. My soul is gone, she took it with her.
As I'm walking down the hallway I see Mia. I hate this bitch so much. She used to bully Desteny . I want to fight her but i know Desteny wouldn't want me to. I walk past her and I shove my shoulder hard against her. She falls. I look back and smile.
As I walk in the classroom you can still hear Mia cursing my name. Every kid in the classroom looks at me. They all look away as soon as I glared back at them.
I look over to my spot to see some nice looking kid sitting there.
" Hola Nena, que necesitas?" He says while checking me out. I can tell he's Puerto Rican by his accent.
" Estas en mi asiento. Muévete no?" I say. He looks surprised, guess he thought I didn't speak Spanish. He slowly gets up and sits in front of me. I put my head down.
I didn't use to be this " mean" but everything changed in 8th grade.
Me, Desteny and Alondra used to be the best of friends. I was the one you didn't mess with, I was the one who was more serious . I was alright I guess but if anybody messed my friends I'd beat their ass. I was like the one who smoked, got drunk and into fights. Alondra and Desteny became my best friends and I loved them so much.
Alondra was the one who was kind even though she's been through hell and back. She noticed i was going through Shit, because she said she saw my bruises. She was tall, had short black hair and she was absolutely beautiful. But don't mess with her, she has a bad temper.
And Desteny, she was the nicest one of the group she was the most innocent of us, she wasn't scared of me, she saw me and knew me when I went through the worst. She was the nerd, but we still loved her, she's what hold us together. She was really short had black hair that went to the middle of her back. She had really big brown eyes and she had a pure heart. Me and Alondra were hella overprotective over her. Especially since we went to a school that was crowded with hood kids, and the school was in the middle of all the gang activity.
Alondra lived in the Northside by some rec- center. I lived in the West side, and Desteny lived so far away from us. Alondra lived like two blocks away from our school. Mostly everyone went to the Rec center after school and especially on Fridays since there where a lot of fights. On Fridays we get out of school early and we went to Alondras house till our parents picked us up.
On July 16, on a Friday 2 years ago. We walked passed the rec and there was a fight going on between some girl and on of our friends. I told them that we were leaving and Desteny didn't want to go because she was scared for our friend. I promised her I would try and stop the fight but only if she left.
Everything happened so fast. Everyone was there. The girl who was going to fight my friend brought her boyfriend. During the fight the girls boyfriend pulled my friend off of his girlfriend, and I pulled the girl up. We heard sirens and everyone panicked and left, I heard my name being called and I ran saw my friend in her car calling me over.
We were driving around and I finally turned on my phone and saw lots of calls and text from Desteny and Alondra. I panicked once I read a text that Desteny sent me saying she was going over to the rec to see what was going on since Alondra parents picked her up 5 minutes ago.
I told my friend to take me back to the rec. Once we go there my heart dropped. It was dark out and I remembered that there was going to be a fight between bloods and crips . Desteny gets scared when everything is crowded and she knew no one there. I saw her and she was on the floor crying, there was some big guys surrounding her, I saw some guy pull out his gun and pointed it at some guy and the other guy pulled out his gun. And desteny was right behind him.
I panicked and ran out of the car and struggled to get through the crowd. I crouched when I heard gunshots going off. Everyone scattered. I was looking around for Desteny I couldn't find her. I got even more scared and I started running and I tripped over something. Everything was so dark, the street lights were out. I pulled out my phone and turned the flashlight on, I dropped my phone when I saw blood. I heard my friend get out her car and run towed me. She had her flashlight on her phone on and she pointed the light to me. And she screamed. I panicked and grabbed the person and pulled them on top of me. That's when I noticed it was Desteny.
My heart sank. I kept saying that I was sorry and I hugged her as tight as I can. I checked for a pulse but there wasn't one. I hugged her even tighter and cried on her. I cried on her until the cop pulled her off me.
Thats when I changed, that's when I knew I was going to get revenge for whoever killed her. She didn't even do anything wrong.
