My head was dizzy with mad thoughts squeezing around my brain, my body was weak from the sadness, my heart was sinking down into my stomach while I slid to the floor, crying hopelessly into my knees. My crying drowned out the music that was softly playing in the background. It's over, I thought. It's officially over. I've lost everything and anything that was close to being mine. The calf muscle tightened up suddenly, sending ripples of pain through me. I grabbed my leg and whimpered in immense pain. I rubbed it softly, sobbing in pain and sadness. My eyes were red and puffy from crying, the tears that once ran down my cheeks left sticky trials ending at the end of my jaw, dripping onto my shirt. I stifled some cries but they came out as little gasps of air. I crawled to the base of my bed and pulled myself up and onto it, the cool covers cradling my hot face. I closed my eyes and buried my face into the sheets, falling asleep.
Ding. I slowly turned my head to my laptop, its screen dark. I untucked a hand from under me and brushed my finger over the mouse pad. The sudden white screen blinded me for a while. There was a little red one next to the Message button on my Facebook header. Suddenly, it turned into two. Then three. I guided my mouse over to it and clicked. Words. So many. In a neat, lengthy paragraph. I lifted my head some and blinked a few times, scanning it.
"I just wanted to say Im sorry."
"I realized how I mistreated you and Im truly and utterly sorry."
"You didnt deserve that."
"I didnt want you to leave, but I basically forced you to and I regret it."
"If there is anything I can do for you, dont hesitate to ask okay?"
I shot up and scrolled to the very top of the page to see who sent it to me. My finger hovered over the touch pad for a moment.
"Milo." I breathed.
Surprisingly, I had no idea where the ability to breathe came from. My brain dug deep into the memories I had buried of me and him. I closed my eyes and watched the fight and me leaving him alone, by himself to fight. How I cut myself off from him and all those sleepless nights of walking past his house, only to feel my bravery crumble inside of me and run the other way, crying. I opened my eyes and took deep breaths to calm myself down.
I scrolled back down to the bottom and placed my fingers so lightly on the keys. I started to type but whenever I read what I typed, I held the Backspace key down until the box was empty, unsure of what to say. Milo. He was here again. I caught myself again and held a hand over my heart, feeling the rapid beats against my ribs. I took in a deep breath and started to type. I told him about I forgave him over and over and how happy I was to see him and how much I missed him and how I thought about him. He started to tell me all of what happened in his life while we were apart. Even though we were talking about bad things, I started smiling. My face was hurting from the crying but it didn't matter. He was here again and everything felt fine. Everything felt okay,
