I'm Not Your Innocent Ex-Wife Anymore (#Wattys2018)

My love

Lissa POV

I don't know why I find myself nervous all of the sudden. My palms are sweaty and my heart is beating so hard I feel like I am about to have a heart attack

I am so mad at myself because I know what's causing it... or who is causing it in this case

Travis...

As I open the door the first thing that I saw was his face. He look so relax just sleeping there, that it reminded me of the all days; where pain was just something that I read in a book

I didn't know what to do. In one hand I want him to open his eyes so that we could sort this whole problem out, but in the other hand I didn't want to face reality just yet

But i guess the sound of my wheels turning in my head woke him up

"Lissa... are you okay? You seem ought of it" He ask all sleepy

I hate it how he could see pass me even when he was only half awake

"I'm okay, there is just a lot of things in mind right now that I have to sort out" I told him as honest as I could

"Well I'm glad you are here right now, because this woman... I think her name was Clair told me that she was my wife. I try explaining to her that you were my wife, but the more I try, the more broken she look" He explain

"Travis I...." the words somehow couldn't come out of my mouth

"It's funny she was looking at me just as you are right now" he said trying to make a joke but the look on my face pretty much gave it away

"Lissa what's going on, you are scaring me"

"Travis, the woman you met wasn't lying she is your wife" I try explaining

"Noo... you are lying" he said calmly but I could tell he was staring to get angry

"Travis listen to me I am not your wife anymore... I'm your ex-wife you left me because someone made you believe that I was gold digger" I said

"No..."

"You didn't even give me a chance to explain, you dispose of me as if I was garbage"

"No, that can't be... I don't remember..."

"That's because you were in a car accident"

"But I love you" He said

"Do you remember how you felt when you saw Clair?" I ask

"Yeah, I was overprotective of her. I just couldn't quite place it why" He told me

"That's because you guys are marry and have a child and one on the way"

"What?" He asked all puzzle

"Travis you were always... or most of the times able to tell when I was lying. So even though this might be scary look at me and tell me what you see" I told him

He slowly met my eyes, until the only thing that we could do was stare at each other. I guess I forgot how mesmerizing his eyes could be. That I somehow got lost on them

"Lissa... I can see in your eyes that you are not lying, but you are telling me something that my brain is not processing. My heart is trying to get there but I don't know if it can" He said while his voice crack

"What am I going to do... I can't..." He didn't finish because he broke down and at that moment my heart broke for him and for me

I didn't know what to say, but I know that actions speak louder than words, so I just hug him and let him cry

I don't know how much time we spent just holding each other, but I guess we both needed this

It made me realize that I would always love him but I learn something more important that day. I learned that love... like the  love that we once had could grow and mature into something more deeply. The kind of love where is not passion driven, but instead a friendship. A real friendship that would last a lifetime. One that would make us both feel happier and whole. In that moment I somehow move on and found the closure that I needed to finally move on with my life.

I know this is not gonna be easy on him, but I have all the confidence in the world that he is going to get pass this and came out stronger than ever

But even though I found my closure, I knew he hadn't. I know him well enough to know that he is not gonna let this go until he finds the person responsible for all of this

And even when we do, his heart is still divided between the past and the present; and I wish I could help him but I know that this is something that he is going to have to do by himself

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