The Name

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You can count on your hand how many times you had seriously disagreed with Harrison on anything during your entire relationship. There was one time when you guys disagreed about who forgot to bring an umbrella when you guys got caught in rain. Another time it was about the placement of things in the fridge. The last time it was about him forgetting to get groceries even though you told him to, and he kept insisting that you did not tell him anything. These disagreements however were solved easily. But this time, it was getting out of hand.

With only few more weeks until your daughter's birth, both of you decided it will be a good time to decide on a name. Both of you wanted to think about it and give your baby a meaningful name, rather than something rushed and weird. So after careful consideration, you made a list of appropriate names, and that's where the trouble began.

"Why would you want to name our daughter that?" you made a face at Harrison, who suggested the name Darcy. "You do know it's not even a proper name right? It means dark."

"How do you know that?" he grumbles, going through the list of names again.

"I looked up the name meanings." You roll your eyes. You didn't know if it was hormones getting to you, or his stubbornness about the name, but you could feel yourself getting more and more annoyed with him. You hated the name Darcy, and the more he insisted, the more you hated it.

"So what if it means dark? Who cares about it? It sounds good." He tosses the name list aside, getting up and starting to pace around. "It's a good name. Why are you being so stubborn about it?"

"I am being stubborn? Haz there are fifty other names in that goddamn list, you can't pick anything else? What is so special about Darcy?"

"Why does there need to be anything special about a name that I like?" it was evident that he was trying to keep his voice down for you, but the agitation was still there. You realized it was getting harder for him to keep his calm.

"I don't like the name." You say finally.

"Well, it's my child as well you know, I get a damn say in it too." And now he was yelling. This instantly brought tears to your eyes.

"I'm not naming our daughter DARCY..." you yell back. He looks at you a moment and leaves the room, minutes later you hear the front door slam shut. The entire conversation makes you tired so you go to sleep, unable to stop crying.

You wake up a few hours later, realizing that he was still not home yet. Sighing to yourself, you get up, and walk towards the nursery. It was painted a rose pink shade, just the one you wanted. The furniture was in darker shade not white, as many people choose. You wanted something different. It was all just as you wanted; Harrison had made sure of that. Even the freaking teddy bears and stuffed toys were of your choice. Seeing all that, the guilt finally hit you. He had done everything just the way you wanted, everything had been done according to your plan, your choices, your likes and dislikes. And you were whining about how you don't like the name he picked. Sitting down on the rocking chair at the corner of the room, you think about how unfair you were being. You call him, but the call went straight to voicemail.

You look at the phone, surprised. Harrison always picks up your call. Always. What is going on? Did you piss him off that much?

The second time the call goes to voicemail, you leave a message "hey Haz where are you? I'm sorry, I was being unfair, I am so sorry, come home, and you never let my calls go to voice mail, are you okay? Please call me."

You could feel the bubble of nervousness grow into panic after another hour of not hearing anything from him. You kept calling him and texting him, hoping he will answer, but to no avail. You call tom, but the calls go to voice mail again. Scared out of your wits, you call Bianca.

"Sup babe!" she says as soon as she picks up, "want another girl day before the baby comes?"

"Have you heard from Harrison?"

"Haz?" her confused voice was enough to tell you that she had not heard from him. "No I have not, why? Is something wrong?"

You recount the entire argument you had with him, the hysteria in your voice rising with each word. By the time you were done with the story you were crying.

"Crap, I'll be there, just hold on."

True to her words, Bianca came over within 15 minutes. You didn't know how many traffic rules she had broken to be there so fast, where it takes at least 30 minutes, but you were not complaining.

"I was being so stupid, why would I yell at him?" you cry into her arms. She was gently rocking you as you cried.

"Babe you were not being stupid, you were just being stubborn, and it's your natural state." She tried to joke hoping it would cheer you up.

"But why won't he pick up my calls? He always picks up my calls. Did he leave forever?"

"Don't be stupid, you really think he would leave you like this?" she rolls her eyes. "he probably has gone on to blow off some steam, all this has been hard on him too you know." Her words twist the knife of guilt deeper into your chest. You know this, you knew this all along, and yet acted like a complete jerk.

"What if he doesn't come back?" you knew you were being complete idiot, asking stupid questions, of course he is coming back. But you could not help thinking what will happen if he does not come back.

Bianca holds your face in her hands "listen to me, and repeat with me, 'I am being silly, Harrison would surely come back, meanwhile I should eat some ice cream and then take a nap.'"

"I am being silly, Harrison would surely come back, and meanwhile I should eat some ice cream and then take a nap." You say, trying to convince yourself.

"Good, honey, don't worry, he will be back, just let him take some time. Meanwhile if you need a good name for the baby, my name is always available." She winks at you before getting up from the couch to get ice cream from the kitchen. You laugh a little at her words. Settling down and wiping your tears, you give the name another thought. It doesn't sound that bad, you don't know why you reacted like that.

Suddenly, you feel a gushing feeling between your legs. Your first thought was if you had peed yourself or not, until the first wave of pain hit.

"B" you called out to your friend, trying not to start crying and panicking. Bianca rushes into the room, not understanding why you called her back, until she notices your face. "The bag is in the closet in the bedroom, grab it, we need to get to the hospital. NOW!" you scream as another contraction hits you. Bianca quickly gets your stuff and within minutes you are out of the door, Bianca helping you to the car, trying to call tom, when he finally picks up after three rings, she yells at him that he needs to find Harrison and get their asses to the hospital. The name of Harrison sends you into another spiral of guilt and anxiety, and a new fear that he would not be there when your little girl is born!

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