It's been a while since I've last written on Wattpad. The reason why you may not be able to see my past works anymore is that I've set them to private. They are too personal for all the people involved since the characters were basically the real-life people around me.
I guess I should start with what's happening now. Today is the 13th of February in 2019, exactly one day before Valentines Day. I've moved to Canada to study towards finishing university and am living in Vancouver as of now. The food and people here are different; I honestly still cannot touch on comparing them with Burmese food and people back in Yangon because the two environments are so different. Everything looks different, smells different and sounds different. The people here are multi-cultural meaning the community is more prone to racial profiling than a single-culture country.
Arriving in Canada as an international student, turning over a new leaf and starting a whole new social life is supposed to be exciting. Most students learn soon after arriving, that their expectations are turned on their heads. Some students actually adopt into society. I didn't feel anything.
There are a lot of things I miss about Myanmar. Drinking and smoking are not allowed if you are a minor. Minors are people under the age of 19 in British Columbia.
I don't know. I think this is enough of a setting to give a brief idea of living here.
Have you ever expected a journey, any journey you've taken to be lonely? Have you ever strived towards a goal alone with an arrogance? Have you ever meticulously planned every single step of your plans to successfully carry out in order to execute a grand scheme?
I guess I know a thing or two about what the answers to those questions could be. Writing down things helps, and talking to people helps especially when you're not so sure of things. Combining the two would be writing for a general audience, a fandom that shares an ideology with the author and uses words to summon new expressions, to generate subplots and to world-build. It's almost self-therapeutic for both parties involved. The writer gains affirmation that they are not alone in the world for believing in something and having an idea that many adopt from you is rewarding in many aspects. The audience gains the vocabulary to debate and visually represent mostly through art, their interpretations of the artist's work, truncating imagination from the truth and creating art from art itself, hence the existence of this piece of writing. Who am I kidding? This honestly isn't for any audience. It's for myself. But yanno, if anyone's reading, good on you for putting up with this boring shit.
Tomorrow's Valentines Day.
The day is not a recorded public holiday but it's recognized around the world. Love is such an important emotion to people, especially the romantic type that at least one holiday had to exist to celebrate it. I don't have a Valentines Day date tonight. A well-known truth often disregarded is that being lonely is not likeable. Not at all it isn't. I've been missing from all the action for so long that I almost cannot describe how it feels like to actively love anymore. All my current problems are based around the past and I blame most of them on love. I mean love not as an emotion but as a consequence of a series of unfortunate events that built-up an idea that I deemed to myself as love.
I like being in love. I feel more purposeful and powerful when I go about my day committed to a significant other. I feel like I can do more than myself in any other situation and that positive feeling of wanting and desire can push a person to do many many things. I've changed for love from a person, sometimes punished myself for showing behaviour that warranted a negative reaction from the significant other. Making plans, and expecting those plans to eventually come true in hopes of creating new and lasting memories promises your happiness towards the near (or far) future.
But that's as far as it goes to describe romantic love in behold of the optimist's eye.
