When Love And Death Embrace (Cordelia Foxx/Goode x Reader)

I Dont Want To Rise If It Means You Have To Fall

Cordelia places her arms on your waist and kissed your neck from behind you. You were stood mixing herbs together to try and make a soothing balm for your hidden wounds. "Hey." Cordelia whispers. You smile as you lift one of your hands to meet her face, you turn your head to kiss her. "Hey." You say sweetly. "What're you making?" Cordelia asked as she watched you grind a few leaves in the mortar with the pestle. "Oh it's nothing, just something for one of the girls." You say, knowing full well that she knew what you were making as she was the one who taught you everything you knew. "What happened?" She asks, her voice becoming a tad more serious. "Oh...uh they just, scraped themselves while they were out." You hesitated as you tried to craft a false story in your mind. "Oh really?" She asked, moving her hands from your waist up to your shoulders then down your arms. "Show me your arms baby." She demanded but in a gentle tone. You chuckled, "what?" You asked as you tried to brush off her words and her hands. "Show me. Your arms." She said again but firmer. "Delia what's wrong with you? There's nothing on my arms." You respond, in a more serious voice. "I know what you've been doing (y/n)." She finally confessed as she turned you around to face her. "I haven't done anything!" You expressed in a hostile manner. Cordelias eyes went soft, "Please... just show me, prove me wrong." She begs. You sigh deeply. "You don't have to worry cordy, I'm fine." Cordelia sighs in response before taking your hand and pulling you slowly closer, suddenly she quickly grabbed your arm and pulled your sleeve up, her grip immediately loosened as she saw a ladder of deep lines up your arm from where you cut yourself. You flinched and yanked your arm back, "oh my god..what have you done." Cordelia said in shock. Your cool facade vanished instantly as you broke down in tears, Cordelia pulled you into her arms and held you tightly. "Why are you doing this? It won't change anything." Cordelias eyes began to fill with tears. "Because I can't lose you...if I have to suppress my powers by hurting myself and punishing myself for these powers just to make you live longer I'll do it, I don't care. I can't do this without you." You wept hard into her shoulder as you spoke. Delia stroked your hair and rest her head against yours as she fought back the tears. "It won't stop you rising." She said. "I don't want to rise." You sniffed. "It's not about 'want' baby, you either are or you aren't the Supreme." She whispered. "But you're gonna die because of me." Your tears soaked cordelias white blouse as you spoke. "Its gonna be okay sweetheart." She sniffed as she tightened her hold around you. "No it's not!" You pulled your head back to look her in the eyes. "If you die, I'll have no one, nothing!" You said frustratedly as you cried staring into her eyes. Cordelias heart broke as she saw the pain in your eyes, "you have the girls, you'll be a wonderful Supreme, I know that and they know that." She said, trying to ease your suffering. "I don't give a shit about being the Supreme, Cordy! I only care about you and I can't-...I can't lose you-" your words stopped as the pain you felt erupted again in your heart and caused you cry loudly and drop your head onto cordelias chest. "Shhhhh it's alright, just breathe." Cordelia tried to soothe you, she allowed you to weep on her, she knew you needed to let it out, ever since she first told you after the first time you made love, she could see your entire world crumble in your eyes as she said those words, those two words, 'I'm dying', that was all it took for her to destroy you but when she told you it was because you were rising as the new Supreme it destroyed you on a level you would never recover from. "I love you (y/n)." She whispered to you. You couldn't reply due to how hard you were crying but you squeezed her in your arms. "Is that why you broke the rules?" You finally managed to muster the strength to talk. "Huh?" She said, unable to hear you. You lifted your head, "is that why you broke the rules?" You said again. "Yes...we've both felt this way about each other for so long and if I'm dying anyway, why not spend my final days showing the woman I love how I feel?" She explained as she tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. You were both breaking the rules by being together, it was a strict rule in the coven that a Supreme could not be in an intimate relationship with a student but since she was dying, Cordelia didn't care about the rules anymore, she loved you and she wanted to be with you, even if it meant she died with a bad reputation to the council, although if Myrtle were still alive, you both knew she'd be more than supportive of your relationship. You swallowed hard as you managed to calm down a bit. "What if I died?" You ask. Cordelias eyes widened, "what do you mean?" She asked, worried about your response. "If I died...would you stay Supreme?" You asked. She shook her head, "no, so don't even think about it." She said firmly. You sighed, "okay, I just thought I'd ask...Cordy?" You sniff. "Yeah?" She replied. "Can we go upstairs? I just wanna lay with you forget everything for a while." You rubbed your eyes and took her hand. Delia smiled weakly but softly, "of course sweetheart." She replied. You both went to her room and you lay in her arms for the rest of the day, you were both silent for what felt like hours but it didn't matter. You could hear her heartbeat as your head was nuzzled into her chest, you wanted to remember exactly how it sounds because you knew in a few days you'd never hear it again, your fingers were intertwined with hers and she had her other hand on your head, she gently stroked your neck as she knew it calmed you if she touched the right area. Your entire body was mixed with goosebumps from her touch and agony from knowing that this could be the last time you get to lay with her like this. You spent every second cherishing her presence, you paid attention to everything, her scent, her heartbeat, her chest as it rose and fell from each breath she took, the way her index and middle fingers traced circles on your neck, the way she used her thumb to caress the palm of your hand as she held it gently. You wished you could freeze time and spend the right of eternity stuck in that moment. Cordelia had accepted that she was dying long ago, you however, couldn't nor would you ever be able to accept it. Knowing that death would creep in at any second of any day and rip her from your arms was a pain unlike anything else you'd ever felt. You loved her with every cell in your body and despite becoming the most powerful witch in the world you felt powerless knowing you couldn't do anything to stop Cordelia's death.