Based Off a Dream

The Revelation

"Tahani's pregnant."

Chidi's eyes widened, and he muttered something about a stomachache. Eleanor ignored his typical Chidisms, for something much bigger was unfolding in this weird neighborhood of the afterlife.

"H-H-How does somebody get pregnant in the Good Place?!" Chidi exclaimed.

"I'm guessing how anybody gets pregnant, did your parents-"

"They told me what the bird and bees are, Eleanor!" Chidi snapped. "I don't only know philosophy. Who's the father?"

"I'm trying to figure that out right now." Eleanor said. "It wasn't you?"

"Eleanor, I'm your fake soulmate. Why would I go out of my way to have sex with someone else?" Chidi asked.

"I dunno, why would you spend eternity not getting laid because of me?" Eleanor rolled her eyes. "Seriously dude, you might as well cut off your di-"

"Eleanor!" Chidi hissed. "Back onto the subject, did Tahani tell you this?"

"Yeah, she had this soft look on her face, which was obviously weird because we usually hate each other's guts."

"Tahani doesn't hate your guts." Chidi interrupted.

"Whatever, I hate her guts and her beautiful ample bosom." Eleanor scoffed. "But she asked if I remembered anything from Glenn's party a few weeks ago, and I told her no. She frowned and gave me the news. When I asked her if she remembers who she forked that night, she didn't answer me."

"So Tahani doesn't know who got her pregnant?" Chidi asked.

"Seems like it." Eleanor sighed. "It's okay, I'll ask Jianyu. He's her soulmate after all."

"Then why didn't you ask him fir-"

"See ya, Chidster!" Eleanor yelled as she left their yellow house.

In the short walk it took for Eleanor to get from Point A to Point B, Eleanor felt a strong headache coming on. She heard a male voice talking in her head, but she couldn't make out any of the words he was saying. His tone sounded...determined, fascinated. As she approached the door to Tahani's mansion, the voice ceased talking altogether. She knocked on it once.

Tahani opened the door, staring at Eleanor with the frightened dark brown eyes of a lost deer. Eleanor's heart melted as she pulled Tahani close and...wait, what the fork?

Eleanor slowly moved away from the hug she didn't plan on giving, and Tahani continued to look into her. And to Eleanor's surprise, there was no inch of hate towards the graceful skyscraper in front of her. Only concern, and another feeling she couldn't understand.

"Did...you have any luck?" Tahani asked.

"No, but only because I was an idiot and I asked my soulmate first." Eleanor shrugged. "What if Jianyu got you preggers? It would make sense, unless you're scared that it's someone else, and you don't want him to know?"

"Y-Yeah, it's best that he doesn't know yet." Tahani looked away.

"Don't worry, caramel. I'm going to go to Michael and sort this out." Eleanor reassured Tahani with a squeeze of her hand.

Eleanor skipped down the sidewalk, feeling a glow from talking to Tahani. Eleanor liked to think it was a sense of pride, doing a good deed by hunting down the father of Tahani's unborn baby, and making sure Tahani was taken care of.

Huh, maybe she did deserve to be in the Good Place after all.

She kept skipping down the sidewalk till she was far from Tahani's mansion. Then, she called Janet.

"Yes, Eleanor?"

"Take me to Michael's office, now."

Janet immediately linked arms with her, and they both teleported to the room that Eleanor woke up in. The familiar "Everything is fine." in green letters was still on the wall.

Janet walked into Michael's office and closed the door. Just as Eleanor sat down on the couch, Janet poked her head out.

"Come in, Eleanor." Janet spoke, still holding a cherry grin.

Eleanor stood up and walked into the office, freezing up. Michael wasn't here, but standing in the office was Jianyu in a...lab coat?

"Jianyu?"

"Jason Mendoza." He corrected her, and Eleanor recognized the voice as the one that was in her head.

"Tahani's pregnant."

"Yeah, I know." Jason had a clipboard and a pen, and he wasn't looking at Eleanor. Instead, he was writing notes in the clipboard.

"How could you be so casual about this? Dead people shouldn't even be able to get pregnant!" Eleanor snapped. "The father of her child could be anywhere!"

Jason stopped writing and looked up, finally grabbing Eleanor's attention. The tiniest hint of a smile graced his lips.

"You really don't remember what happened at Glenn's party, do you?" Jason asked.

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" Eleanor groaned. "Keep being cryptic with me, and just tell me!"

"Okay, if you insist." Jason smirked. "Although to completely understand what I'm about to tell you, I must formally introduce myself. I'm Jason Mendoza, personal assistant and trusted scientist of our architect Michael."

Eleanor had too many questions pertaining to who Jason was, but she didn't speak. She had a quest to help Tahani, and Jason was the key.

"Well, you were right in a way." Jason began. "Nobody before Tahani has gotten pregnant in the afterlife. Well, with a real baby anyways. But I wanted to test out if you'd have sex with Tahani. I knew you would, so I wanted to try an even wilder test. You see, I had implanted male genitals on you. You didn't know I gave you them, but you woke up on this chair and left without question."

"The first thing you did was go to Glenn's party at Tahani's mansion." Jason grinned. "You marched right up to Tahani and told her what new body part you had. You walked away to get a shrimp cocktail, and she was blushing from ear to ear. It would appear that my test would be a success. You see, in those genitals I gave you, I ingrained magic in them. Not only would it disappear after one night, but you'd lose memory of that night too. And, you would impregnate any woman you slept with."

"You're telling me t-that-"

"Yep! After most people had left the party, Tahani pulled you aside and kissed you right on the mouth. And the rest, is history." Jason broke eye contact to continue writing on his clipboard, still grinning.

Eleanor wanted to do a lot of things: ask questions, scream for Michael, ask Janet why she was still in the room smiling. But instead, she lifted her closed hand and punched Jason in the jaw before storming out of the office.

Quickly, the fire in her chest gave way to a cold fear of being the father (or mother?) of Tahani's baby. And Tahani knew! But she didn't tell Eleanor, allowing her to go on this terrifying journey where she found out Jianyu's identity...

Mind spinning, she made her way to Tahani's mansion.