Mr. Dunn the Story you never knew

Mr. Dunn
The Story You Never
Knew

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Chapter 1

Mr. Dunn was born during the Mrs. Stolow Dynasty, on February 31st, 00000 BC at 36:84bm. It was 308170947827 years later and Mr. Dunn was living a peaceful life, until disaster struck! It was 6:66pm and Satan himself came out of nowhere and personally killed his pet goldfish . From that moment on he vowed to himself to kill Satan and avenge his pet goldfishes death. S, he had only one choice. He had to go to the wisest person in the village to gain knowledge about Christianity ( because he was a DUMB atheist and nobody liked him because all atheists are dumb and their going to hell). That person was Mrs. Italia.

Mr. Dunn had only heard rumors about Mrs. Italia. Village people said that she had gone into hiding in the Sacred Church to get away from the tyrant known as Mrs. Stolow, and her belief that the only religion is ELAology. People said that the church was only a couple of miles north, so Mr. Dunn packed his ninety tons of food, and headed to seek out the church. On his third day he ran out of food and was now starving. He started to believe that Mrs. Italia was just a myth. SO he decided to do the next best thing and he went to religion school, and he couldn't believe his eyes! Mrs. Italia was there grading everybody's test, and of course failing Chris Dziuba :()"/.<.

Mr. Dunn went up to ask her how to kill the devil and she responded with one word, "the rosary". So with this newfound knowledge, Brian went to the rosary shop to get a rainbow limited edition rosary ( as seen on TV). When Brian got to the shop he noticed that the shopkeeper was a young, 26 year old, obese, balding man. His name was Matthew Zaros!

Eating a donut, Mr. Zaros asked Brian "whaddya wan". Mr. Dunn responded " I would want a rainbow color limited edition rosary to kill Satan. Mr. Zaros said mockingly " So your DUNNNNNNNNNN with Satan" and at that moment Brian falcon punched Matthew Zaros into oblivion and robbed the store and got 69 rainbow colored rosaries, and 240572735039572047 tons of food. Now that Brian Dunn was had a weeks worth of food, he go out and search the world for Satan.

Before Brian went to find Satan he needed to find where he lived, so he went up to one of the guard sof Stolow and asked him where the devil lived. The guards name was Kenneth Reigle, and Brian asked again where Satan lived and more importantly, if he was single or not. Now Mr. Reigle responded jokingly " up your ass" and Mr. Brian was not very happy with this answer. Mr. Dunn got very mad and gave him a warning, and now Mr. Reigle had gotten his very first detention since it was his fifth warning this week. SO Ken went home crying and used Stop It to report Brian, but nobody cared about Kenneth so nothing was ever DUNN.

Unfortunately the guards partner saw what just occurred and he walked right up to him and gave him a 0%. He said his name was Robert Kowalski. Fortunately Brian knew Mr. K's weak spot, and he just reminded him that his girlfriend dumped him when he brought the engagement ring, and he will forever be alone, and with that he went home crying with Ken.

The next day Ken and Rob went to their leader Mrs. Stowlow , and reported Brian DUnn for bullying them and how he wanted to kill the devil. Mrs. Stolow was furious, not because he bullied Ken and Rob, but because ELAologies lord and savior was the Devil.So Mrs. Stolow sent her best knight, Joey Alskar to go and capture Mr. Dunn. Not much was known about him, but legend said that he one time shot up a school, and he was a master of pen guns. Once Joey captured Brian Carol would use the rack which was a torture device which would stretch the victim until he split in two just like she did to all her students.

Mr. Dunn was walking through the woods and he was really hungry. The last time he had food was three minutes ago, and he ran out of him 1000000000000 tons of food and he only traveled for two day. After a couple of minutes of crawling, he collapsed from hunger and fainted. An hour passed and he woke from his slumber, and conveniently there were some totally non suspicious Big Macs right in front of him. Being the greedy fat ass that had no self control, he grabbed the Big Macs and ate them without thinking of the consequences. Little did he know that it was a trap set by Joey Alsakar. Before he could react he started to feel funny, and then he fell asleep. However before he fell asleep he heard Joey mutter, sweet dreams mortally obese.