The Trouble With Love (SHOEY Fanfic) DISCONTINUED

Ashlynn (Chapter 26)

I paced the white, boring hallway, rubbing my face. It's been almost three hours, and Shane's still not here.

Neither is the baby, I thought to myself.

I stared around the halls, watching nurses dressed in scrubs talk and make themselves busy as I stood alone. Izzy wanted Sawyer with her, so I was stuck out here, hoping everything was going okay. I started getting anxious again, even though I took my medication, so I started pacing again. I could tell it was pissing one nurse off, but i didn't care.

Izzy's baby is finally here. I've been staying with Shane for almost 5 months of the pregnancy. We grew closer as brothers, but the air was still awkward when we got too close. Of course, my feelings for him never ceased.

I stayed out of the house as much as possible, collabing with lots of Youtubers, shopping, and visiting Luke.

Ingrid found out about Luke and I one day when she saw us kissing, and she accepted it fairly quickly. I explained the whole story. I'm glad she didn't freak out and be all sympathetic and whatever. She basically just hugged me and told me she was here for me.

The nurse that has been glaring at me for the past half hour finally stalked up to me.

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to take a seat." I looked at her equally pissed.

"Excuse me, but my sister is having a baby at this moment. I cannot sit still." I smiled sarcastically and watched her storm back to her post. What a bitch.

A few other nurses next to her were practically drooling over me, which pissed me off even more than the bitchy nurse. I can't trust any woman enough to go out with them... Ever since Hannah hurt me, I haven't been able to trust any girl besides Ingrid, Meghan, and Izzy.

Besides, I'm pretty sure I'm forever alone and forever gay.

Shane was supposed to be here with me at the hospital, but he "had to take a shower first".

I'm willing to bet my life that he's either eating or fell asleep. He's been making bullshit excuses for everything lately.

He'll sleep for hours at a time during the day, while still sleeping at night. I've come to the conclusion that either A) He's being a dick B) He's avoiding me C) He's got depression. I'm hoping with everything I have that it's not the last one.

A few days ago I was talking to him, then he just flat out got up and went to bed, while I was mid-sentence. I was about to ask him where we stood, relationship/friendship wise, but as soon as I said the word "us" he up and left, muttering, "No, Joey,". I was crushed, to say the least.

I've been crushed so many times, I'm surprised I'm not used to it already.

Thankfully Luke understands how much Shane means to me, and still hasn't given up on being around me. Luke sticks around even in my darkest moments. He's seen me have panic attacks, and helped me through them. I went over to his house that night and just ranted, crying and all, about how i cant do this anymore. I didn't have a panic attack that night, I just felt utterly alone.

Loneliness is probably one of the worst feelings in the world. I just wish I had normal reactions to things... In my head, bad things are much worse than they are. But I think too much as well, so everything is exaggerated. Not overly dramatic, just enough so I feel shitty.

I've been ignoring Shane since, but when Sawyer called about the baby, I finally spoke to him.

Izzy wanted both of us there, since it was going to be our niece. I was technically her brother, and Shane was her biological brother.