Dear Diary

chapter 1

Dear diary                 date 2nd of August hey if you reading this something happens to me so from now on just in case I'll tell you everything that happened to me I'm 15 birth date 15/04/03 ,,my life hard but nothing to complain about as other people have it worse than me so I'll start with my family my father is a junkie so my mother picks up after him he's abusive and violent so my mother won't leave him I've told her many times before to dump him and do better with her life but every answer is its to compacted,Im the only child so it's hard no brother or sister to fight with or argue or even share secrets ,all I have is my diary ,I've seen 15 counselors but who's counting my mother tried to put me on anti depressants but I'm not depressed I'm lonely Ive never understud relation ships or even friend ships that's because I've never had one I'm the person that was called a geek I have even heard the teachers calling me a freak. I sat on the shredded chair next to the wore out table.I eat a bag of crips that expired a week ago.  My farther sat at the other side of me he was eating Cheerios with Budweiser.I couldn't get the picture out of my head,he sat there with a grown out shirt and a cheerio stuck in his belly button.
The buss arrived at 8:46 precisely I sat at the front of the buss alone when I got of the buss and set a foot on the court yard I was tripped up and called gay by Micheal he is full of himself and spiteful he is the "popular guy" he wouldn't give anyone a chance to be better than him I picked up myself and now broken glasses and followed behind the rest of the students when. I got into the class I sat at the end of the room where a word couldn't be heard. Notes where passed around to me I had about 59 notes calling me creepy loner even a gay freak. When class ended the teacher kept me back saying that I'm failing and then gave me a lecture about the real world, for like an hour.When I walked out of class with my head down. Dragging my feet of the floor the bell rang so I ran as fast as I could to my counselors class she told me to get home as fast as I could with no explanation or even a reason.When I got home I seen my mother and six people sitting at the worn out table crying I've never seen my mother so sad in my life even though sometime she cried herself to sleep she told me to sit down she said he then stoped to think about how she would say what had happened you fathers dead then everyone cried even louder he over dosed on achol and drugs no emotions showed on my face but inside I was ...happy now my mother could do better with herself I woke up to cries at night I reached for my diary and it wasn't there the only thing that poped into my head was what if.I approached my mother's room slowly so my mother couldn't cover up and act as if nothing happened I seem her on the floor reading my diary I regretted everything I had said I swolled the saliva that gathered up in my mouth and walked into her room I approached her slowly the smell of achol worsened every step I took mother I cried don't do something you will regret she passed out half way trying to hug me I took the diary from her cold faint hands and layed her out on her bed.