𝖑𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖊 [nochelle & richola]

seventeen.

it's been a week since i talked to ozzy, and i still haven't said anything to lola. i think she's avoiding me.

noah comes home today. i wanted to meet him at the airport but nationals is coming quick and emily didn't want me to miss more rehearsals, so he's meeting me at the studio later. i think i'm going to tell him i love him, because i do. i want him to know that i do.

i know i should talk to lola, but i don't really know what i'm meant to say. she'll be in studio a right now, probably. i'm in shakes and ladders.

i get up, leaving my unfinished smoothie where it is, and head to studio a. i know i need to tell lola how i feel before noah gets home, or i probably never will.

i walk nervously into the studio, finding lola with amy, who is practicing her nationals solo. they've started spending a lot more time together, and it's safe to say i'm a little jealous. lola is my best friend.

"hey, lola?" i say quietly. she turns around and bites her lower lip as she sees me. "can we talk?"

"about what?" lola asks.

"you know what."

"fine, but quickly, i'm helping amy."

"could we talk.. alone? please?" i whisper.

"whatever. in the corridor so amy can rehearse," lola says blankly.

i nod, and we both head into the hallway outside.

"can you just say what you have to say so i can go back to helping amy?" lola asks. her voice is cold and i know she doesn't want to talk to me.

"lola," i pause, "i like you," i whisper. my voice is trembling, it's the first time i've admitted it out loud.

her eyes perk up and she looks at my face, studying me. "you do?" she asks hopefully. her voice sounds happier now.

i nod, "i like you, but- but i love noah."

"oh," she mumbles, her head drooping back down again.

"i'm sorry," i mumble.

"do you really like me?" lola whispers.

i nod, "yes lola," i say softly. i take her hand, expecting her to yank it away, but she doesn't. "lola, i've never felt like this for a girl before, so it's all a bit confusing, but i do like you."

lola bites her lip, "but you love noah."

i look down then back up at her. "yes. i love noah."

"and you want to be with him," lola says quietly. i can see in her eyes how much she's hurting, how much i'm killing her.

"i want to be with noah," i say, "maybe, in a different story, or in a different universe, we're meant to be together. just not this one."

"okay," lola whispers, wiping a single salty tear from her cheek. "i understand." she turns and leaves, heading back to studio a. i watch her from the corridor for a few moments. she and amy embrace in a tight hug, and it takes every part of me not to wish it was me she was hugging. but i love noah, and i'm going to tell him that.

we agreed to meet in studio 1 in half an hour, but my head's all over the place and i really just want to dance alone, so i think i'll head there now.

i find my way to studio 1, but as i'm about to enter, i see something i could never of imagined happening. actually, scratch that, of course it's happening. of course i could never trust him.

noah is standing in the middle of studio 1, his lips locked with jacquie's, and his hands running wild on her body. and i'm stuck. in the doorway. watching my boyfriend make out with one of my best friends.