RedAce // ziam

twenty five

*Liam's POV*

It doesn't get easier- not even after me trying hopelessly to push Zayn away. If anything, everything was shattering around me, if it hadn't shattered already. With the constant aching pain of losing Zayn, there was also the guilt; I never gave Zayn the chance for him to be able to state out his reasons. Instead I faced him with my anger, ruining possibly my every chance of being with Zayn.

But it wasn't like I could ever get back with Zayn - never, with the way my life was taking twists and turns; never, until I have RedAce off my back.

"LIAM?"

I frowned at the croaky sound of Harry's voice, a moment later the frown deepening when I realised that Harry was out of his room for a change. It has been days since I last saw him. I kept telling myself, it had nothing to do with Zayn's suspicions or unmentioned accusations but for some reason I couldn't face Harry and as far as Louis had cared to inform me - just like me, Harry had kept to his room lately.

Louis didn't know why.

As I stood up from my bed, unwillingly pushing the covers away from me and made my way towards the door, I heard Harry cursing silently to himself before he gave me another yell, his voice sounding even more broken and weak than before.

And the small annoying presence of fear in his words was want I chose to ignore.

"Harry" I was frowning again, because just maybe, possibly, Harry looked worse than me - like he had gone without food or sleep for days. I feared he had done just that.

"Can we talk?" It's what's said first. Even if it was formed as a question, that wasn't a question - it was more of a statement.

Harry, are you okay?

Was what nearly slipped out but instead I nodded and managed to whisper out a short, "Sure"

If possible, Harry stiffened even futher making me rethink over my own answer. Yet, I knew that changing my answer wasn't going to change Harry's mind - he had something to tell me and he was putting that before his own hesitation. 

I climbed down the few stairs I had left, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes for I had got hardly any sleep last night for some unaware reason. As the silence advanced in the room, I took that as a chance to observe Harry, who mind I say, didn't even look like himself anymore. What was going through his head? What was he going through? There so many more questions forcing themselves into my mind.

Yet,  I couldn't ask them. 

Because along with those questions, there was another voice - this one painfully annoying, constantly hissing, repeating, to me the words Zayn had said not so long ago. This voice was warning me that whatever Harry had to say to me wasn't good, that in the end, his piece of information was going to leave me even more broken (if that was a way to put it).

Without realizing I shivered, putting my arms closer around myself, wishing that maybe, just possibly, Zayn was here to hold me, wrap his arms around me and tell me that everything, all this, was just a god damn nightmare. But he wasn't here and he wouldn't be here.

I shook my head and fixed my eyes back on Harry. 

Zayn shouldn't be on my mind, and maybe, whatever Harry has to say had nothing to do with him. 

Harry was trying to sneakily glance up at me to which I couldn't help but raise my eyebrows and frown. It was like he was waiting for me to explode, like he was certain of my reaction. 

"This is something you need to know" He finally spoke, stumbling on his feet as he walked towards the stair - coming closer to me, "I don't want you listen to me explain this to you, because there is no except-able reason for this and I shouldn't hurt you any further by forcing down my reasons on you. It's not fair"

"Harry...what are-"

A harsh knock at the door made me stop and look away from Harry's face. Harry didn't move so I took that as a hint and moved past him to open the door only to have it slip right past my fingers as soon as I set my eyes on the other side. 

Zayn. 

What was he doing here? 

"Li, fuck, look I know. You hate me and all that but open the door."

My grip on the door knob tightened as I twisted it ever so slightly, drawing a deep breath.

"Damn it. Liam. Open the door and I swear you'll never see me again" I could hear the slight pain in his words and I couldn't take it. The honestly in his words threatened me. The thought of never having to see Zayn again was enough to make me open that door. 

"Don't"

"huh?" Zayn frowned, taking a step closer to me. 

He was making something as easy as breathing impossible for me, he shouldn't be standing this close, shouldn't be making me feel all this when all I wanted was for him to not have an affect on me. 

"Nothing" I replied, shaking my head and moving aside for Zayn to be able to come in. 

He still was statisfied with my answer, his curious eyes were enough evidence for me to know that. 

"I need to talk to you" Zayn said, his eyes locking with mine. 

"What about?"

"Harry-"

"I know. You don't want to hear anything about Harry but I need you safe, Li and I need you to know even if in the end I end up losing you, I need you to know. Don't stop me, Liam" Zayn interuppted, his hand reached out to grab my hand and I easily let him slip his fingers through mine. I squeezed his hand, pulling him slightly closer to me. 

I couldn't help. I craved him. 

"I'll listen" I whispered, tugging at my bottom lip slightly. 

"I think Harry has something to do with Redace-"

"No-"

"I said, don't stop me" Zayn snapped, his voice stern yet his eyes were desperate for me to listen. "Liam, I think Harry is Redace"

"No way, Zayn. No Fucking way" I hissed, going to pull my hand out of his hand but his hand was helding on to mine tightly and even I didn't want to let go off his warmth but before I could debate over it, there was a small cough from behind us. Zayn and I looked towards the cough only to find Harry standing there. 

"He's right. I'm Redace" 

[ hey guy! how are you all? I hope everyone is doing great and I am really really sorry for all the long wait I have put you guys through but I had my reasons. Personally, I don't feel like writing like I did before, I find myself enjoying it less and less every time I decide to write something so I am taking a break and hopefully I will get my interest back. So that was one of the reasons and another was that I was on holiday for about over a month so I couldn't write there. But I am hoping the updates will get back on track. 

Hope this chapter was okay, sorry for any typos or errors. ]

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